Awkward Situations Thread

[HÃœK DUP]

There is one of these in this other message board I go to. Just post awkward situations as the title implies. There are lots of good one on the other message board, alot of them are hilarious. I'll start with one of the laast thing I posted it the other thread.

The other day, I had a test for science, and it was open notes, but I didn't have them so me and a friend in the same class decided to skip it, and go chill in the nurse's office until the period was over. So we both go in, I say I had a stomach ache, and just wanted to lay down for an hour, and so I layed down on one of the beds, and the lady shut the curtain. I thought that the friend with me would get the bed thing next to me, but I didn't know that he got sent out. So, after like 10 minutes, I went to open the curtain so we could talk or some shit, and I open up the curtain, and there is just this fat redhead girl there, and she just looked at me, and I was just like, "Uhhhhhhhhh shit my bad." and just shut the curtain. Felt so fucking awkward, I just listened to my mp3 player until the end of the period.

[ACTION NEWS...]

How izzat awkward?

[HÃœK DUP]

I completely invaded her privacy. I mean, imagine just chillen on a bed, and some random kid you don't know just opens up the curtain and looks at you......kinda weiiiird.

[Forum Police]

I got really drunk at school today, and during chemistry my teacher asks me to do some Lewis dots thing on the board and she asks me to write the dot thing for Boron, and I straight up said "What the FUCK is a Boron?" Then she told me to just go sit down and ended up falling out of my chair for another 15 minutes.

[screw_loose]

close.

[FIGHT THE BUFF]

Originally posted by Forum Police@Jan 13 2006, 07:14 PM
I got really drunk at school today, and during chemistry my teacher asks me to do some Lewis dots thing on the board and she asks me to write the dot thing for Boron, and I straight up said "What the FUCK is a Boron?" Then she told me to just go sit down and ended up falling out of my chair for another 15 minutes.
Liar

[screw_loose]

yeah, she would have smelt on you. you would have gotten in trouble for swearing, and falling out of your chair? she would have gone to see whats wrong with you, smelt alcohol on you. and if she didn't, the nurse DEFINATLEY would. close.

[dirmaster0]

Yes please close...


One time I went to homecoming shitfaced and burnt--no real classes besides being obligated to attend--fucked around--later at the game I talked shit to some wiggit faggot and saw him trying to sell shit to this wannabe rasta *****, So I tried to fuck this kid up since he's a dumbshit for selling where theres gonna be Off-D pigs there watching retarded ass football, when one of the supervisor adult bitches that think theyre pigs comes up and tries to take control of the situation.

We ended up being the bitch to the ground, the wiggit n rasta got booked for posession, assault, and public disturbance (disturbing the peace) charges while my ass bugged out and got off scott free--but the weird thing is, The supervisor bitch got busted for a meth lab a month later--and he was related to the wiggit in the first place :-D

:D GOTTA LOVE THE MIDWEST :lol:

[screw_loose]

leave.

[Nyc Sno]

awkward situation of today there was anal lube in my friends parents room

[Forum Police]

1. It's not like I'm a fucking moron, I use Listerine spray throughout the day to cover the smell.

2. She's a younger teacher, everybody swears in her class.

3. The desks are very close together, I'll fall onto the top of this girl's desk if I fall over, while still half sitting down.


Nice try though screw loose.

[HÃœK DUP]

Originally posted by screw_loose@Jan 13 2006, 08:34 PM
leave.
shut the fuck up and stop ruining my thread asshole.

[fannypack uprock]

Originally posted by Forum Police@Jan 13 2006, 08:10 PM
1. It's not like I'm a fucking moron, I use Listerine spray throughout the day to cover the smell.

2. She's a younger teacher, everybody swears in her class.

3. The desks are very close together, I'll fall onto the top of this girl's desk if I fall over, while still half sitting down.


Nice try though screw loose.
what a moron. didnt know what boron is. in chemistry class.
:blink:

[AKalien]

i was talking to a girl on the phone

after a half-hour of talking pretty smoothly

i ackwardly fell silent and so did she

then we started talking again

[meetermaid]

today i was jamming with my friend and this guy whom we're starting a band with, and my friend went upstairs to get food, and i realized the other guy was wearing an iron maiden shirt, so i called him a banana (he's asian) and he looked all hurt and he was like "i'm a cbc, there's a DIFFERENCE!!" and then it was all awkwardly silent until andrew came back to save the day. yeeeeeah.

[Forum Police]

Originally posted by fannypack uprock+Jan 13 2006, 09:26 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (fannypack uprock @ Jan 13 2006, 09:26 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Forum Police@Jan 13 2006, 08:10 PM
1. It's not like I'm a fucking moron, I use Listerine spray throughout the day to cover the smell.

2. She's a younger teacher, everybody swears in her class.

3. The desks are very close together, I'll fall onto the top of this girl's desk if I fall over, while still half sitting down.


Nice try though screw loose.
what a moron. didnt know what boron is. in chemistry class.
:blink: [/b][/quote]
Wow.

[fannypack uprock]

Originally posted by Forum Police+Jan 14 2006, 11:40 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Forum Police @ Jan 14 2006, 11:40 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> Originally posted by fannypack uprock@Jan 13 2006, 09:26 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-Forum Police@Jan 13 2006, 08:10 PM
1. It's not like I'm a fucking moron, I use Listerine spray throughout the day to cover the smell.

2. She's a younger teacher, everybody swears in her class.

3. The desks are very close together, I'll fall onto the top of this girl's desk if I fall over, while still half sitting down.


Nice try though screw loose.
what a moron. didnt know what boron is. in chemistry class.
:blink:
Wow. [/b][/quote]
except its not really that funny that im atleast a little bit intelligent. good try though.

[Msfyt]

repost from the skate thread
still makes me laugh

lol...ok funny story

i take off from my house with my skate, about 5 blocks from my house i look down at my skate. theres something trailing behind my board. So i stop to see whats stuck on the trucks.
lmao, its my panties (not the ones im wearing). i was like what the fuck is that?! oh my god its my undies and slipped them in a pocket....you see i keep my skate right by my bedroom door, which is also where i keep my laundry basket. and some how my undies must have found away around my skate without me noticing (i was in a hurry).
anyways i dont think anyone saw what excatly was dragging behind my skateboard but it did make me blush and laugh very hard

[HÃœK DUP]

LOL. I have to post the best one from the thread on the other board, that was just posted today, definitely my favorite.

I was at a friends house, I think around February in his room. On TV there was a Victoria's Secret Model Fashion Show thing, and he suddenly says "I uh, gotta go take a shit." About 15 minutes later, I realize after a few drinks and a couple Dr. Peppers, I have to fucking piss, BAD. I storm in the bathroom ready to push him off the shitter to urinate, when he's not there. I distinctly remember hearing the bathroom door close, and it wouldn't have been from the other bathrooms which were downstairs. So I'm standing in his bathroom, and the toilet lid is down and everything, but the shower curtain is closed. I start to piss (in the toilet), and then it hits me, "he's in the shower/tub." So, amidst pissing, I rip back the shower curtain to find my friend, laying down in the tub, naked, legs spread apart, pumping his dick like there's no tommorow, with his other hand's fingers UP HIS FUCKING ASSHOLE (I don't know how many were in there, I didn't pay that much attention to it). I can't think of anything else to do at him laying down in a tub, but piss all over him. It was spraying all over him, and he trys to get up, and what does he do? Slip on the piss and fall back down in the tub. I could hardly control where i was pissing from laughing so hard.

Easily the greatest moment of my life.

[cess!]

Originally posted by AKalien@Jan 13 2006, 10:35 PM
i was talking to a girl on the phone

after a half-hour of talking pretty smoothly

i ackwardly fell silent and so did she

then we started talking again
happens to even the best of pimps

and screw loose do you try to be the forum asshole
or is it by accident
cus either way , your the forum asshole

[Torrent]

No one can beat it and it happens to everyone. When ever you are watching a movie with family and a sex scene comes up. I usually get up and go get something to eat at that point.

[fannypack uprock]

Originally posted by HÃœK DUP@Jan 16 2006, 08:31 PM
LOL. I have to post the best one from the thread on the other board, that was just posted today, definitely my favorite.

I was at a friends house, I think around February in his room. On TV there was a Victoria's Secret Model Fashion Show thing, and he suddenly says "I uh, gotta go take a shit." About 15 minutes later, I realize after a few drinks and a couple Dr. Peppers, I have to fucking piss, BAD. I storm in the bathroom ready to push him off the shitter to urinate, when he's not there. I distinctly remember hearing the bathroom door close, and it wouldn't have been from the other bathrooms which were downstairs. So I'm standing in his bathroom, and the toilet lid is down and everything, but the shower curtain is closed. I start to piss (in the toilet), and then it hits me, "he's in the shower/tub." So, amidst pissing, I rip back the shower curtain to find my friend, laying down in the tub, naked, legs spread apart, pumping his dick like there's no tommorow, with his other hand's fingers UP HIS FUCKING ASSHOLE (I don't know how many were in there, I didn't pay that much attention to it). I can't think of anything else to do at him laying down in a tub, but piss all over him. It was spraying all over him, and he trys to get up, and what does he do? Slip on the piss and fall back down in the tub. I could hardly control where i was pissing from laughing so hard.

Easily the greatest moment of my life.
HAHAHAHAHAHA

holy fuck thats funny.

[fannypack uprock]

so im staying the night at one of my girlfriends (at the time) house and her parents are okay with me staying the night there from time to time but theyre real strict about how we sleep or where we sleep tryin to keep an eye on us. so we always just stayed on the couch in the living room so we could hear the bedroom door open and know when they were coming out to check on us. we always kinda fooled around anyways but tried to be slick about it. well one night she gets a little friskier than normal and starts undoing my pants and whatnot and im like man i dont know how slick this can be (cause the bedroom opens up into the hallway which looks right at the couch) but i wasnt about to ask her to stop so we take it into the bathroom.. my pants are down shes on her knees so on and so forth when we hear the bedroom door open FUCK ME i thought, the bedroom is like 5 steps from the bathroom door which was wide open so she kinda starts freaking out im just trying to do up my pants when right there my body chooses to have a seizure (which happens from time to time for whatever reason) so at the most ridiculous point in time it could have possibly happened.. i wake up halfway hanging out of the shower with my pants undone and both her parents looking at me standing in the bathroom with her behind them with this terrified look on her face. almost got away with it. yet so far away.

[HÃœK DUP]

HAHA

Seizurowned.

[skaterbomber]

my parents walk in on me banging the shit out of my girl
and they didnt know i was home from work and they thought
somthing happend to her because she was bengin the walls and screamin

now thats a little bit more awkward then the first post

[skaterbomber]

double post sorry
but the one above mine is hillarious

[good]

Originally posted by skaterbomber@Jan 16 2006, 11:44 PM
my parents walk in on me banging the shit out of my girl
and they didnt know i was home from work and they thought
somthing happend to her because she was bengin the walls and screamin

now thats a little bit more awkward then the first post
haha thas funny no akward is win u are getn some face froma girl and here mom walks in last week that happened to me.....and the first thing her mom said was get your mouth of of him right now haha i ws dien laugh win she said that

[thephicode]

Originally posted by Torrent@Jan 16 2006, 09:36 PM
No one can beat it and it happens to everyone. When ever you are watching a movie with family and a sex scene comes up. I usually get up and go get something to eat at that point.
haha that's always funny, funnier is my moms reaction. if her ex looked too much shed yell at him and shit and if he turned away shed yell at him for pretending to not look but that he was still a dirty pervert anyways. haha

long phone silences are akward... especially after 15 minutes... hum...



As guys know... going to the urinals and having someone standing abit to close to you and you cant pee... and he cant pee... and both wait for one to give up and leave without peeing yet... and invariably one gives up, goes to wash his hands and pretends he actually peed walks out... waits and runs back in as soon as you leave the washrooms haha

[UKCsire]

was rompin with my girl and her mom didn't know I was at their house cause i got there late the night before - she doesn't knock on the door cause she was just gonna tell her that she was leaving for work - of course she decides to walk in when we're in quite a compromising position and all she has to say is '...oh' and leaves. Haha turns out she thought [a] that my girl was asleep at the time [b] that I turned around, saw her and kept goin. Neither are true and believe me, my next investment is a door lock for her room.

[newk_one]

Originally posted by AKalien@Jan 13 2006, 10:35 PM
i was talking to a girl on the phone

after a half-hour of talking pretty smoothly

i ackwardly fell silent and so did she

then we started talking again
that shit is thefunniest ... just simple but awkard none the less.

[calmlikeabomb]

welli'm a walking awkward situation.....

[newk_one]

Originally posted by skaterbomber@Jan 16 2006, 11:44 PM
my parents walk in on me banging the shit out of my girl
and they didnt know i was home from work and they thought
somthing happend to her because she was bengin the walls and screamin

now thats a little bit more awkward then the first post
dude how was it afterwards ... id like to know ..

[newk_one]

Originally posted by thephicode+Jan 17 2006, 02:54 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (thephicode @ Jan 17 2006, 02:54 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Torrent@Jan 16 2006, 09:36 PM
No one can beat it and it happens to everyone. When ever you are watching a movie with family and a sex scene comes up. I usually get up and go get something to eat at that point.
haha that's always funny, funnier is my moms reaction. if her ex looked too much shed yell at him and shit and if he turned away shed yell at him for pretending to not look but that he was still a dirty pervert anyways. haha

long phone silences are akward... especially after 15 minutes... hum...



As guys know... going to the urinals and having someone standing abit to close to you and you cant pee... and he cant pee... and both wait for one to give up and leave without peeing yet... and invariably one gives up, goes to wash his hands and pretends he actually peed walks out... waits and runs back in as soon as you leave the washrooms haha [/b][/quote]
true. and funny ...and especially awkward ..... but why is that ?

[dotone]

heres one
i was banging my ex when i here the door open. my room is the 3rd story so there a a flight of stairs before you get to my room. i hear someone runing up my steps, so i pull out and sit onmy bed. of course my dick is hanging out and can easly be seen, and who could it be but my 7 year old cousin. he comes up, says hi, gives me a high five and runs back down stairs, having absolutly no idea what had happen.my ex and i just looked at each other and shrugged and went back to the deed.

[GRSKL]

I was at my friends house watching Star Wars. I had just seen it a couple days erlier, so I fell alseep. I woke up right durring the canteena scene, where the band is playing that song they always do. Instinctively I began singing along with the song, making up my own lyrics, which went "you can suck my testicles, its alot of fun". Little did I know, but my friends dad had come downstairs and was on the computer just 10 feet behind me. Man that was awkward.

But then some days later, my friend was havin sex with his girl, and his dad walked in on them, so now I don't feel as awkward around his dad anymore, I figure he's forgotten about my song.

[calmlikeabomb]

Originally posted by GRSKL@Jan 18 2006, 03:17 AM
I was at my friends house watching Star Wars. I had just seen it a couple days erlier, so I fell alseep. I woke up right durring the canteena scene, where the band is playing that song they always do. Instinctively I began singing along with the song, making up my own lyrics, which went "you can suck my testicles, its alot of fun". Little did I know, but my friends dad had come downstairs and was on the computer just 10 feet behind me. Man that was awkward.

But then some days later, my friend was havin sex with his girl, and his dad walked in on them, so now I don't feel as awkward around his dad anymore, I figure he's forgotten about my song.
hahahahha :lol:

[Exploited]

Originally posted by screw_loose@Jan 13 2006, 08:27 PM
yeah, she would have smelt on you. you would have gotten in trouble for swearing, and falling out of your chair? she would have gone to see whats wrong with you, smelt alcohol on you. and if she didn't, the nurse DEFINATLEY would. close.
teachers are fucking stupid (some of them) ive gone drunk to school before and they didnt know shit. i even had to go to the front of the class to do some shit.

but ya swearing would have gotten you in shit

[Jugga]

The other morning, I awoke and was greeted by a protuberance in the pelvic region. This was nothing new, so I didn’t really think much of it and went off into the kitchen to fetch a glass of apple juice. I wore a turtle neck and no bottom to bed--like I do every night--so my situation was quite obvious. This particular nighttime attire is my little way of sticking it to the man. While I was enjoying my delicious, pulp-free beverage, my grandma walked passed me on her way to the bathroom. She caught a glimpse of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow out of the corner of her eye and was instantly overwhelmed by a state of shock. She turned to me with a face of utter disbelief, and was evidently speechless. Honestly, this struck a cord with me, for I saw it as a sign of blatant disrespect, and replied to her silence with, “sure, like its never happened to you, gaylord.�

[Jugga]

It was in the golden pre-teen era where I discovered many of the things that would become prominent in my life for years to come. One of these great discoveries was the ancient art of self-induced genital stimulation. By the time I hit my teens, I was already a certified professional in my craft. One day, while I was deep into a heated game of zipper dice, my grandmother decided to waltz in with a tray of finger sandwiches. She gave a sharp, high-pitched yelp and dropped the tray; there was mayo everywhere, as if mockingly hinting towards what could’ve been. I instantly responded to her confusion with an ingenious explanation. I explained how I had a itch deep in my urethra, and massaging the problem area was the only remedy for what ailed me. She wasn’t buying it.

[JETc17]

^ you must have had one HELL of a time with your granny

[Klaz]

Originally posted by dirmaster0@Jan 13 2006, 08:27 PM
Yes please close...


One time I went to homecoming shitfaced and burnt--no real classes besides being obligated to attend--fucked around--later at the game I talked shit to some wiggit faggot and saw him trying to sell shit to this wannabe rasta *****, So I tried to fuck this kid up since he's a dumbshit for selling where theres gonna be Off-D pigs there watching retarded ass football, when one of the supervisor adult bitches that think theyre pigs comes up and tries to take control of the situation.

We ended up being the bitch to the ground, the wiggit n rasta got booked for posession, assault, and public disturbance (disturbing the peace) charges while my ass bugged out and got off scott free--but the weird thing is, The supervisor bitch got busted for a meth lab a month later--and he was related to the wiggit in the first place :-D

:D GOTTA LOVE THE MIDWEST :lol:

LOL!!!!!!!!

this made me laugh for ages!

[cess!]

hah jugga those are some funny storys


very descriptive

[Jugga]

I got more...
unfortunately...



I remember it as it was yesterday: 1994 was quite the eventful year. I was 5 at the time, and not much was going on in my social life (as if to say the scar tissue on my wrists tells a different tale of the years to come). One distinct memory of that fanciful era in my life was the day my grandmother made a dreaded discovery. As she cleaned my room, she found a pair of soiled under britches hidden in the back of my sock drawer. What a catastrophe. I tried to play it off as if I didn’t put it there. I told her I was helping a friend out by hiding them there for a few days until things blew over with his mom, but she wasn’t buying it. She gave me scat and jive talk for it, but I lived to see another day; I was soon to discover this was much to my disadvantage. A few days after that, I went to take a shower but my mother was in the bathroom across the hall from where I slept. “No big deal,� I thought, and decided to take my bathing and grooming to my grandmother’s bathroom. This was a huge mistake, for what I saw still makes it’s appearance in my dreams on restless nights. My grandmother had soiled under britches of her own soaking in the sink. That day, I died a little on the inside.

[dotone]

hahahaha what the fuck

[Mute1]

rofl! jugga ur fuckin hilarious!

[Jugga]

When I got home from a trip, I asked my grandmother where my dog was. She said, "he's in the house," to which I replied, "is he in the house, or is he IN DA HOOUUUSEEE." Silence draped over the both of us for upwards of 15 minutes, and she was rushed to the hospital to be treated for third degree burns. I mean, that bitch got TORCHED with relentless, un-forgiving un-forgivness..

[Kustom]

Back when i lived with the rents i have the whole upper floor (like 1 giant room) and i was going at it with the woman

well all of a sudden my mom walks in and im just like ahhhhh and she looks with this blank face and just says "ohh i see your busy"

well she told my dad about it and my dad just looked at me and said "Hey im glad your not gay or anything like that"

ever since that they would never come upstairs when i had my g/f over

[Jugga]

Last year, I went on a road trip with the family to Colorado for Christmas. While on the road, my grandmother reached in the glove box to grab a pencil to turn off our busted radio, because the “repeat� button had broken, and we’d been listening to the same Duran Duran song for the last 18 hours. While aimlessly poking about in the glove box, she took her eyes off the road, and as fate would have it, grandmamma-dukes ran over a reindeer. We got out of the car and walked over to the battered, but still-breating animal. My grandma got down on one knee next to it, saddened by the entire ordeal. I, on the other hand, had a very awkward situation on my hands, for I was laughing, almost uncontrollably. By this time, two or three cars had stopped at the shoulder of the road to make sure everyone was alright, and still, I find myself laughing. To this day, I'm sure they all think I'm some sadistic asshole that was laughing at the dead animal; but I was actually laughing at the irony of my grandmother running over a reindeer, and it not being the other way around.

[cowalski]

I was over at warren g's house the other day just maxin and relaxin with chuck norris and my grandma had just rolled a fat blunt, we must have sent that thing around for twenty rotations, beautiful, although when it got down to the end chuck sat out on the sesh. He said the roach burns his beard, which if you didn't know is the true source of his power. Anyways my grams was takin a fat hit off of the ultra resonated roach when it must have got too hot, and she jumped back, her boob came flying out of her shirt and hit warren square accross the face. And that was a bit of a problem because when you walk into his pad theres a big sign that says 'no grandma titty face slapping until after 5 pm', and the current time was 4:45. Chuck told warren he could roundhouse kick us both, since our bodies would immediately disintegrate, thus no evidence of our ever being there. But in actuality it turned out to be pretty mellow, warren let it slide since it was an accident and it was really close to 5 anyway.

wear your respirators kids

[gnarlatron3030]

true story, huh?

the whole chuck norris thing is a little played out

[madsencarl]

Originally posted by HÃœK DUP@Jan 13 2006, 07:00 PM
There is one of these in this other message board I go to. Just post awkward situations as the title implies. There are lots of good one on the other message board, alot of them are hilarious. I'll start with one of the laast thing I posted it the other thread.

The other day, I had a test for science, and it was open notes, but I didn't have them so me and a friend in the same class decided to skip it, and go chill in the nurse's office until the period was over. So we both go in, I say I had a stomach ache, and just wanted to lay down for an hour, and so I layed down on one of the beds, and the lady shut the curtain. I thought that the friend with me would get the bed thing next to me, but I didn't know that he got sent out. So, after like 10 minutes, I went to open the curtain so we could talk or some shit, and I open up the curtain, and there is just this fat redhead girl there, and she just looked at me, and I was just like, "Uhhhhhhhhh shit my bad." and just shut the curtain. Felt so fucking awkward, I just listened to my mp3 player until the end of the period.
holy shit man, you almost got contact with a chick! i'm so fucking proud of you ya 10 year old fuck.

[cowalski]

Originally posted by gnarlatron3030@Jan 19 2006, 03:43 AM
the whole chuck norris thing is a little played out
thats funny he said the same thing the other day

[Msfyt]

Originally posted by Exploited+Jan 18 2006, 05:27 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Exploited @ Jan 18 2006, 05:27 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-screw_loose@Jan 13 2006, 08:27 PM
yeah, she would have smelt on you. you would have gotten in trouble for swearing, and falling out of your chair? she would have gone to see whats wrong with you, smelt alcohol on you. and if she didn't, the nurse DEFINATLEY would. close.
teachers are fucking stupid (some of them) ive gone drunk to school before and they didnt know shit. i even had to go to the front of the class to do some shit.

but ya swearing would have gotten you in shit [/b][/quote]
aaahhh the joys of university bars on campus means its not our fault we come to class drunk!!!

[sika_2002]

haha, blame it on the university.
the other day i picked my cat up because he had somehting in his eye, i put him down and had a hair in my mouth and said "iv got pussy hair in my mouth". my dad looked at me with a strange look, was kinda awkward yeh

[newk_one]

hilarious .!

[StoopKid]

i was skateboarding downtown at like 2 am. some bum came up to my buddy and he said...



"Yo, brotha brotha man, yo man, hear me out, man."
"All right..."
"Yo man, just hear me out man, gimme two minutes of yo time aight?"
"Yeah man, sure"
"You look like a brotha man that would listen man, thank you, thank you."
"No problem man."
"Okay, listen, listen, yo, hear me out man, hear me out. Anything...that you got, that you could give to me, would be grrrreat."
Considering the fact that he had over 90 dollars in his wallet at the time, he didn't really want to risk opening it and being robbed, so regretfully he told him he had nothing.
"Sorry, nothing."
"Thanks fo' hearin' me out man, thank you, thank you. You a brotha man."
"Thanks man."
"I love you, man"
"......I love you too."

[HÃœK DUP]

Originally posted by madsencarl+Jan 19 2006, 05:59 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (madsencarl @ Jan 19 2006, 05:59 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-HÃœK DUP@Jan 13 2006, 07:00 PM
There is one of these in this other message board I go to. Just post awkward situations as the title implies. There are lots of good one on the other message board, alot of them are hilarious. I'll start with one of the laast thing I posted it the other thread.

The other day, I had a test for science, and it was open notes, but I didn't have them so me and a friend in the same class decided to skip it, and go chill in the nurse's office until the period was over. So we both go in, I say I had a stomach ache, and just wanted to lay down for an hour, and so I layed down on one of the beds, and the lady shut the curtain. I thought that the friend with me would get the bed thing next to me, but I didn't know that he got sent out. So, after like 10 minutes, I went to open the curtain so we could talk or some shit, and I open up the curtain, and there is just this fat redhead girl there, and she just looked at me, and I was just like, "Uhhhhhhhhh shit my bad." and just shut the curtain. Felt so fucking awkward, I just listened to my mp3 player until the end of the period.
holy shit man, you almost got contact with a chick! i'm so fucking proud of you ya 10 year old fuck. [/b][/quote]
haha, you're so fucking stupid do you even understand what I said at all. It was a FAT UGLY SICK chick, dumbass. Only you would rub that in.

[Jugga]

lol @ "I love you too"....

I've had many an awkward situation that had to do with a misplaced "I love you" I felt needed to be responded to...

[wherespillz?]

Calling my teacher mom in front of class in first grade....

Doing daytime traffic hits and taking out a can, running up to a wall and forgetting what my throwie looked like and standing there like an idiot for a minute or two until I remembered...

[Havoc411]

http://img284.imageshack.us/img284/7533/10016554fi.png


that was kinda ackward

[Kingz514]

^ ???
a year or so ago i was in my basement wit my girlfriend at the time makin out and shit, and it was kinda hot so she took of some of her clothes lol
and my mom came down and she saw a bunch of clothes and we were all red and shes like :blink: what the hell

[weak0ner]

uhhhhhhhh....

[Havoc411]

at this show last friday, me and my boy were talking shit about this band, and the dude who does vocals happened to walk by. kinda ackward

[sika_2002]

haha iv done that before. oh well the truth hurts

[Jugga]

I was with this bird at a party that took place in a telly...


I went to a public bathroom, cause they have those condom dispensers, and put my money in...
and instead of a jimmy hat, I got a tampon...
cause I was in the lady's bathroom... :ph34r:

and....


















I had a tampon....

[Jugga]

I once was awakend to find an elevation in the crotch area of my pants: I had the morning wood. I had to take a massive piss, so I got up and carelessly headed for the door, walking completely up-right in the comfort of desolation. When I was about to go through the doorway, my grandma decided to go into my room to use my computer. I made the huge mistake of turning sideways, facing her, and trying to edge my way passed her while sharing the same, small space that is the doorway. I didn't quite make it without her knowing what was up, no pun intended. A stare and twisted grimace further confirmed my fear to be a reality.

[HÃœK DUP]

Haha.

I went to the bathroom today in like 3rd period or whatever. And so there are these 2 kids in there, on is at the 2nd urinal over from this little wall thing, and there are only 4, and a small one to the left wall, so I go over to the little one to put space between us. So the 2 kids leave, and my bladder isn't quite cooperating with me so I had to take a little bit. All of a sudden one of the guidance counselors come in. This guy, is the soccer coach of the school, his daughter is a jock, that lives near me and gets the same bus. So he says hey whats up i say hey, and he says nice or something haha, I think he thought I responded to whats up. So he's just like AHHHHHHHHH when you gotta go, you gotta go, and all of a sudden I just hear the loudest noise of piss just spraying against the back part of the urinal, and the dude is just going like a racehorse, and I kind of chuckled a little bit. And he goes what was that, and I say I sneezed my bad. So he has like a conversation with me, and I finally finish and go, well c ya and just get out and run. So awkward and weird.....OH and I forgot to add that this dude fucking gives like massages WHENEVER he talks to anyone, especially someone who is on a soccer team. So I was just praying to god that he didn't give me a massage, I really wasn't in the mood for one from a guy, as I usually never am. Fuck.

[ASEN]

Imitating the way black people rap and walk in the subway with my brother, we didn't realize that these three black guys were walking behind us. When we got outside i found out my lighter didn't work and my brother didn't have one. Pretty awkward.

[AKalien]

a group of hot drunk girls in the back of a black truck came by

they did the usual yelling "hottie" catcalling and i just said nothing

the second they did that i was poledancing on a street light and they threw free beer at me...


...it was expired

[wickedincentives]

yesterday I had just used the bathroom and I was gonna miss my bus so I was running on the street to catch it and my willy slipped outta by boxers from the joggling around and I felt something cold and metallic on my dick and noticed it was hanging outta my zipper that I had forgot to zip up... I dont think no one saw me... well saw it. lol

[paint-in-my-crackspoon]

the other day VAbomber was on his way to my house n i was goin ta meet his half way, so i start walkin n see what i thought was him so i stoped n started rolling on the ground (me n him do like sum playaround parkour, like in the middle of the sreet in front af car n at the metro nm stuff) the i jump up n was like "oooo what you got on that bitch", n he didnt say shyt so when i got closer i saw it was sum old bitch :lol:

[-save]

i did my homework......................................and. . yeah it was pretty awkward

[Havoc411]

today someone in class farted durring an exam when it was real quiet, and they got laughed at.


i remember one time my calc teacher was sitting on a desk and farted too

[newk_one]

making out with my girl while im on her and her mom comes down the stairs and just sees me hurry of my gf. .... i juste froze .... so i was half on my girl and half sitting down on the couch .... ....
in my long johns !!!
anyway ... a bit awkward ..

[Havoc411]

[15:27] Ultra-violence: im going to the doctor at 11
[15:27] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: nothing, we were just talking about australia
[15:27] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: to get you bitch ass moles looked at
[15:28] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: i bet theyre on your dick
[15:28] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: he doesnt have one
[15:28] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: yeah
[15:28] Asen: hey stop it now
[15:28] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: its all one big mole
[15:28] Asen: the hell is this about
[15:28] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: ahahaha
[15:28] Ultra-violence: yeah man moles suck
[15:28] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: one big mole, lole\
[15:28] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: you suck more
[15:28] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: lol
[15:28] Asen: fine im with vegi though
[15:28] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: dont say lol
[15:28]Asen: you want war
[15:29] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: fags on myspace say lol
[15:29] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: lol
[15:29] xHAVIKx H*H nigguh FK: shutup
[15:29] Ultra-violence: friend of mine found out he has cancer after getting one of his checked
[15:29] Six Hundred And Thirteen. Habs 4-3!: girls on msn who are really annoyinh and talk about makeup say lol
[15:29] Ultra-violence: that was like 8 months ago
[15:29] Ultra-violence: guys dead now



ackward

[Kingz514]

one story..
im not bragging :unsure:
i was drunk
and gettin head behind a movie theatre
and i cockslapped her right in the eye

oh ya
then the day later i was at >skea<'s house and the same bitch came over..
and i got head in his brothers bed.. and skea was on the comp like 10 feet away.. and when his bro came home and went to bed i was laughing my ass off :lol: :lol: :lol:

[Jugga]

Once, I was surfing the net, when I came across a pornography website. I usually stay away from the unholy, but I was compelled enter the site and poke around for a while. Needless to say, my efforts to prevent an erection were futile against the fantastic amalgamation of sexy Latin lesbians and battery operated clitoral stimulators. After about 16 minutes worth of discomfort due to my now-tight pantaloons and inevitable wedgie, I decided to try my hand at nullifying my situation- literally. I drew a bath, curled up with the underwear catalogue from Macy’s, and began milking the long teat. While I was going at it, my grandmother walked into the bathroom, and seemed quite hurried. Thankfully, she didn’t notice me behind the curtain, due to her haste, but what was to come was most unfortunate. She proceeded to remove her under britches, and sat on the can. For the next 10 minutes, I witnessed the single most horrific event I’ve ever had to witness- my grandmother taking a dump. I, in all my disgust, was forced to keep quite and bare the smell of charbroiled broccoli that filled the room because I still had a chub going on, although it was rapidly declining. After spewing the horrific sounds of flatulencies and words of distress fit for a sailor, she stood up, flushed, and began to de-robe for a shower. In a fit of desperation, I jumped out of the bathtub, still holding the catalogue, and ran passed my now-naked grandma on my way out the door. That night, I skipped dinner.

[Kingz514]

big fucking words jugga

[Jugga]

I'm in a perpetual S.A.T. prep phase...

[Mse]

MORE
and thanks for that soulwhaat album that thing is doooope

[Havoc411]

hahahaha

[Cobb ovk]

ok this is prolly one of my least favorite storys ever....



i feel as if u guys understand me so here it goes...



haha


..


ok so i was like on aim at like 3 in the morning and like i was talking to thi babbbbbbbbe
and she said she was all horny and wanted to come over so i was like k

so i snuck out my front window to meet her in front of my house

and when i sneak out that means they come to me i dont walk anywhere..


so anyways we walked behind my house like behind my garage

and she starts like saying lemme slob ur knob


and i was like um ok

so she unzips mein pants and begins to slob

but then i was like wtf cuz i felt metal

little did i know she had fucking braces so like the faster she went the more it hurt especially on the sides

and like when i would like fidget and shit cuz she could go deep and shit

and like i would be like breathing weird and i started like dieing laughing

because it felt weird as fuck and it kinda hurt

and i skeeted on her and so forth


then uhhh

the next day i checked my dick and it had like marks on it like when u get a hicky

nah mean?


haha its a true story


and the moral is braces hurt society

and the awkward part was me laughing at her really hard and having her look up at me with a mouth full of man meat


those explanations are for the people who well be like wtfff

[Havoc411]

haha, mouthfull of man meat

[Ravek]

my brain usually erases awkward moments so i can't remeber any cus there so awkward, i remeber this one tho

i was at my freinds house and he has a lot of sisters and his hot sister told me to run down stairs from his kitchen into his basment naked with a bunch of her sisters down ther so i ripped off my clothes and ran down then walked back up naked and her mom walked into the kitched while i was naked and i said we were playing strip poker and i was dared to walk down stairs, it was quiet after that

[Havoc411]

AA bought that KY warming liquid shitm and i found it in his drawer, and i was looking at it and reading all the hilarious information on the bottle, and his mom walks into his room(the door was open) and i quickly threw the bottle in the draw and closed it, and she saw it anyways and she looked at us weird(at this point me and uno were dying with laughter) and she was like, "what the fuck, are you 2 like rubbing lotion on each other or something"

and we were like like "no....." and she walked out


i bet she thinks were gay or something


that was ackward

[AKalien]

um... this isn't really ackward but my friend was video taping my now ex-girlfriend making out with another girl on the bus

and my friend told me she went home with her
the next day... we saw she had a broken finger :huh:

[newk_one]

i dont get that one ??

anyway heres a sort one .....

i was making out pretty intensly with my gril and i duddenly hear my mom coming in my room. she usually never comes i9n here so i didnt really slow down ..... then when she knocked and came in without autorization we quickly sat down on the eadge of my bed.
i soon realized that i had set up the tent......in my pants ...
and then i had to answer a couple questions from my mom because she wasnt leaving !!

[AKalien]

i meant my ex-girlfriend broke her finger in another girl's pussy

i guess they were experimenting

[recneps]

awkward situation, my friend plays this show (he sings for this hardcore band) hes piss drunk the whole time, its at some kids house and theyre are the kids parents and children listening, as he sings he scream profanitys constantly, and as we are getting up the gear my friend vomits from too much jack Ds and as were carrying him out we walk right past the kids parents holding a 6-10 year old childs ears shut.

amazing.

[sucker free city]

Originally posted by Cobb ovk@Jan 25 2006, 06:52 PM
ok this is prolly one of my least favorite storys ever....



i feel as if u guys understand me so here it goes...



haha


..


ok so i was like on aim at like 3 in the morning and like i was talking to thi babbbbbbbbe
and she said she was all horny and wanted to come over so i was like k

so i snuck out my front window to meet her in front of my house

and when i sneak out that means they come to me i dont walk anywhere..


so anyways we walked behind my house like behind my garage

and she starts like saying lemme slob ur knob


and i was like um ok

so she unzips mein pants and begins to slob

but then i was like wtf cuz i felt metal

little did i know she had fucking braces so like the faster she went the more it hurt especially on the sides

and like when i would like fidget and shit cuz she could go deep and shit

and like i would be like breathing weird and i started like dieing laughing

because it felt weird as fuck and it kinda hurt

and i skeeted on her and so forth


then uhhh

the next day i checked my dick and it had like marks on it like when u get a hicky

nah mean?


haha its a true story


and the moral is braces hurt society

and the awkward part was me laughing at her really hard and having her look up at me with a mouth full of man meat


those explanations are for the people who well be like wtfff
dude u said the word ''like'' so many times i had to stop reading.
are you like a girl, cuz u like sound like one.

[doudenci]

haha I used to have an issue with saying like like all the like time like. anmd using... three...dots...alll....the.....time........

[Cobb ovk]

sorry sucker free city but im not a girl

sadly i speak reallllly bad english


im mexican so its hard for me to say stuff as good as i should

[newk_one]

just posting to get this thread up there again ... i like hearing about these stories ..... but i guess were runnig out ?!

[meetermaid]

Originally posted by newk_one@Jan 28 2006, 07:35 PM
just posting to get this thread up there again ... i like hearing about these stories ..... but i guess were runnig out ?!
one time i was talking to this guy on msn and i was telling him what a whore this chick emma is...and then he's like "...she's my girlfriend..". that was a little awkward. :ph34r:

[MasterBlaster]

Originally posted by Cobb ovk@Jan 25 2006, 06:52 PM
ok this is prolly one of my least favorite storys ever....



i feel as if u guys understand me so here it goes...



haha


..


ok so i was like on aim at like 3 in the morning and like i was talking to thi babbbbbbbbe
and she said she was all horny and wanted to come over so i was like k

so i snuck out my front window to meet her in front of my house

and when i sneak out that means they come to me i dont walk anywhere..


so anyways we walked behind my house like behind my garage

and she starts like saying lemme slob ur knob


and i was like um ok

so she unzips mein pants and begins to slob

but then i was like wtf cuz i felt metal

little did i know she had fucking braces so like the faster she went the more it hurt especially on the sides

and like when i would like fidget and shit cuz she could go deep and shit

and like i would be like breathing weird and i started like dieing laughing

because it felt weird as fuck and it kinda hurt

and i skeeted on her and so forth


then uhhh

the next day i checked my dick and it had like marks on it like when u get a hicky

nah mean?


haha its a true story


and the moral is braces hurt society

and the awkward part was me laughing at her really hard and having her look up at me with a mouth full of man meat


those explanations are for the people who well be like wtfff
Dude, one of my old girlfriends had braces, and that shit never gave me anything like that, you probably have herpes now. Go see a doctor immediately.

[MasterBlaster]

So my most akward situation, believe it or not, was when I was doing my first scene in porn. I was in a national park about an hour south of Los Angeles, and had been shaking hands with beef for about a grand total of 2 hours, as they were doing one photoshoot and one video from the same scene. Anyways, by the time I was allowed to finish, I had two bright purple blood blisters from irritating shit that came off of this rock that I was sitting on.

[Jugga]

A lot less awkward than disturbing...

[Kingz514]

Originally posted by sucker free city+Jan 25 2006, 11:08 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (sucker free city @ Jan 25 2006, 11:08 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Cobb ovk@Jan 25 2006, 06:52 PM
ok this is prolly one of my least favorite storys ever....



i feel as if u guys understand me so here it goes...



haha


..


ok so i was like on aim at like 3 in the morning and like i was talking to thi babbbbbbbbe
and she said she was all horny and wanted to come over so i was like k

so i snuck out my front window to meet her in front of my house

and when i sneak out that means they come to me i dont walk anywhere..


so anyways we walked behind my house like behind my garage

and she starts like saying lemme slob ur knob


and i was like um ok

so she unzips mein pants and begins to slob

but then i was like wtf cuz i felt metal

little did i know she had fucking braces so like the faster she went the more it hurt especially on the sides

and like when i would like fidget and shit cuz she could go deep and shit

and like i would be like breathing weird and i started like dieing laughing

because it felt weird as fuck and it kinda hurt

and i skeeted on her and so forth


then uhhh

the next day i checked my dick and it had like marks on it like when u get a hicky

nah mean?


haha its a true story


and the moral is braces hurt society

and the awkward part was me laughing at her really hard and having her look up at me with a mouth full of man meat


those explanations are for the people who well be like wtfff
dude u said the word ''like'' so many times i had to stop reading.
are you like a girl, cuz u like sound like one. [/b][/quote]
LMAO

thats some funny shit man

[STONES ONES]

one time i took a picture of my grundle with my pee pee hangin down on my digital camera. i took the camera to a party and forgot the picture was on there and a girl asked to see the camera and saw it and showed some other girls at the party and they confronted me infront of everyone. the thing is my turtles only 3 inches long.

[screw_loose]

AHAHAHHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAH

[ASEN]

In the hallways at my school, i was just getting out of class with my books in my hand when this guy walked right into me and knocked all my shit down to the floor. He was sorry, then i said ''Pick up my damn books, at least''. He just looked at me funny then left.

[Fever]

Originally posted by HÃœK DUP@Jan 13 2006, 07:00 PM
There is one of these in this other message board I go to. Just post awkward situations as the title implies. There are lots of good one on the other message board, alot of them are hilarious. I'll start with one of the laast thing I posted it the other thread.

The other day, I had a test for science, and it was open notes, but I didn't have them so me and a friend in the same class decided to skip it, and go chill in the nurse's office until the period was over. So we both go in, I say I had a stomach ache, and just wanted to lay down for an hour, and so I layed down on one of the beds, and the lady shut the curtain. I thought that the friend with me would get the bed thing next to me, but I didn't know that he got sent out. So, after like 10 minutes, I went to open the curtain so we could talk or some shit, and I open up the curtain, and there is just this fat redhead girl there, and she just looked at me, and I was just like, "Uhhhhhhhhh shit my bad." and just shut the curtain. Felt so fucking awkward, I just listened to my mp3 player until the end of the period.
what I find more disturbing is you would rather want a bed next to your buddy then a girl

[sealer]

DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND. SHES FAT.

[2134]

my friend was having sex with a chick(both naked) and then the her dad comes in punches naked friend and tries to fight naked friend. Friend gets a ride home from dad. Im sure this would have been pretty aqward but one funny ass story he told me.

[freka]

Originally posted by STONES ONES@Jan 30 2006, 09:34 PM
one time i took a picture of my grundle with my pee pee hangin down on my digital camera. i took the camera to a party and forgot the picture was on there and a girl asked to see the camera and saw it and showed some other girls at the party and they confronted me infront of everyone. the thing is my turtles only 3 inches long.
why the fuck did you take a picture of it the first place

[Gara]

drunk off my ass at a party and me and the girl i came with decide to go outside. To make a long story short she starts sucking my dick and is so fucked up that she ends up missing and poking herself in the eye giving herself a black eye. Then the next morning i get a call from her best friend asking how she got a black eye, and i had to sit there and explain what happened that night... AWKWARD AS SHIT

[SiMpUhL]

wow ummmmmm msome how i dont believe that maybe its jus me

[spetzZz]

Originally posted by AKalien@Jan 25 2006, 09:46 PM
i meant my ex-girlfriend broke her finger in another girl's pussy

i guess they were experimenting
wait a sec. are you saying you drove someone to lesbianism? :blink:

[fuckin villan]

one of my most awkward situations, besides havin gf's mom walk in on you, was when i was going to pick up some weed for my gf's sister, because i could get great weed at the time. So i waltz downstairs, and spotting here sister seated (alone i thought) in the living room, announced that i was going to get the weed, and could i have the twenty dollars from her for the weed. So she turns around and looks at me really strangly, so i was like wats wrong? She doesnt say a word, just points across the room towards her mother, who had been sitting in the shadows the whole time. So at this point i dont know that her mom doesnt care about weed, so i just kind of stood in the living room, wishing id learned how to teleport. My most awkward moment :(

[HÃœK DUP]

haha, just a good thing she didn't care, my mom is such a bitch about me smoking.
One of my friends had his mom on the phone (his cell) and he told his mom to hold on a sec (so he could take his hit from the blunt) and after he did his thing, he said he forgot his mom was on the phone, and it was still open in his lap, and by the time he remembered she was still there, him and his buddies were already talking about weed and shit and his friends were like pass the blunt and shit, so his mom heard the whole conversation, and that was how he got caught the first time haha. Must have been so odd and embarassing to have your mom find out like that.

[dotone]

i remember when me and my homie used to smoke weed, he got cought one time, and his mom came over to tell my parents about me and him smoking, and how they should look into getting me a drug test.all i could do was stair at the floor.

[r.A.n.D.o.M]

this fat kid our friend always asks if he can go tagging with us

he fuckin sucks so much and cant run away for shit , and if the stupid cunt gets caught he expects us to come back and help him and im not much of a fighter

its so awkward saying no so we just say yes and dont phone him lol

[Havoc411]

walking through the woods coming out from a spot, and i look to my right and theres a bum reading the paper taking a shit.

put my hands in my Vest pockets and unlatched the balisong incase he got roudy.

he didnt, but for a moment when i first saw him i stopped walking for a couple seconds and couldnt stop staring him in the face.

most ackward moment of my life

[.ProperDozerPhaze.]

Once i was talking a shit and my girlfriend called...akward I had to make up an excuse to call her later. =D
Nah...Im just joking that never happend, id be wierd if it did though.

The most akwardest shit that ever happened to me was, I was chillin' with some friends and alot of fine girls so I was able to get one back with me for a ride. Shit happened and next thing you know she's feeling on my nuts so I slide down to take off her capris and panties and when they come off, shits fucking hairy and it
about made me throw up. Shit sucked cause I was ready to grind...I had to tell her I forgot my rubbers and didnt wanna risk it.
Dont get me wrong some hair isnt that bad but then you gotta stop to find the hole shit aint right :(

[more_soup?]

so i got my gf bent over on my bed naked (my bedroom is in the basement) and my sister opens the door and comes down the stairs so i just sit down and slip my dick in my shorts and she just covers herslef wiht the blanket shitty deal was i was busting a nut as i put my shit awayanyway my sister gets down the stairs smiles at me and i kinda gave her this sketchy smile (trying to keep a staight face when your busting a nut isnt easy) and then she just grabbed some shit of out the freezer and went back upstairs...didnt relize a thing...

[FuLa]

damn probably about 7 or 8 years ago...I was at an amusement park(I was 12-13) w/ some friends and we met a couple of girls we knew...I had a hole in my pocket which allowed for easy access to my balls for me to scratch inconspicuously

I noticed that my zipper was open when the two girls in front of me were staring at my crotch with their mouths open...they saw EVERYTHING..hahha they didn't say shit but later I told my friends and it gave us a nice laugh...the girls were never the same around me. :D

[EGO31]

these are cool man i'll post mine l;ater i'm at school now so i really just want to read more embarrasing stories.

[Kao.Ali]

my mom caught me drunk, and she had to give me a ride home... pretty awkward
it really sucked too, cuz now i have to be home right after shcool

[What Happened to the Letters?]

Originally posted by SiMpUhL@Mar 15 2006, 01:34 PM
wow ummmmmm msome how i dont believe that maybe its jus me
yeah dude...thats bulshit...unless you were liek skullfucking her and hit her in the eye she wouldnt get a black eye from accidentally hitting your dick oin it, the head of it is soft...def woudlnt give a black eye

[What Happened to the Letters?]

most akward shit...too fucki nweird to say it actualyl saddnes me to recall it...but weirdest ill tell

I was at the beach with my firends and this reatard in our grade wlaks up to us with her hadn in her fuckin bating suit lifts her arm up to point to some shit nad had hairy ass armpits also had pubes sticking oput the bathign suit...and she had a shaved head at this point casue she had got surgery about a month earlier...wish i had a lfick of it to put on ebaums world...also the other day in school two retards were cranking sean paul songs off their cell phone and grindign each otehr too it in the gym before first block...also priceless shit wish i had a camera phone to put it on ebaums world or just to sell...

[What Happened to the Letters?]

Originally posted by doudenci@Jan 26 2006, 12:03 AM
haha I used to have an issue with saying like like all the like time like. anmd using... three...dots...alll....the.....time........
haha i do that shit lal the time liek right after i just said time i went to put three dots just out of habbit(just did it agian had to erase and right this)

[What Happened to the Letters?]

Originally posted by Jugga@Jan 25 2006, 04:20 PM
Once, I was surfing the net, when I came across a pornography website. I usually stay away from the unholy, but I was compelled enter the site and poke around for a while. Needless to say, my efforts to prevent an erection were futile against the fantastic amalgamation of sexy Latin lesbians and battery operated clitoral stimulators. After about 16 minutes worth of discomfort due to my now-tight pantaloons and inevitable wedgie, I decided to try my hand at nullifying my situation- literally. I drew a bath, curled up with the underwear catalogue from Macy’s, and began milking the long teat. While I was going at it, my grandmother walked into the bathroom, and seemed quite hurried. Thankfully, she didn’t notice me behind the curtain, due to her haste, but what was to come was most unfortunate. She proceeded to remove her under britches, and sat on the can. For the next 10 minutes, I witnessed the single most horrific event I’ve ever had to witness- my grandmother taking a dump. I, in all my disgust, was forced to keep quite and bare the smell of charbroiled broccoli that filled the room because I still had a chub going on, although it was rapidly declining. After spewing the horrific sounds of flatulencies and words of distress fit for a sailor, she stood up, flushed, and began to de-robe for a shower. In a fit of desperation, I jumped out of the bathtub, still holding the catalogue, and ran passed my now-naked grandma on my way out the door. That night, I skipped dinner.
this is teh single greatest story ive ever heard...hahaha...and i thought mine was akward...

[SeKs]

Bustin a nut when someone walks in fucking SUCKS ASS. Had the same thing happen to me when my ex's sister walked in. Tucked that shit in so fast i busted and sat there while my face frosting is getting all over the inside of my pants.

I about fucking Cried...

[joker00]

my and my boiz was token it up and i jsut got busted 4 mj and they kepp shit goin till i got back so i go down stairs 4 were we toke it up and im sittin there wit r ghetto bong and hittin and his mom walks down and opens the door smiles and askes if we want cookies or a cake and im sittin there like im doin durgs and the only thing u got 2 say is cookies or cake (when i was busted she foudn them smokin and was ight wit it and i didnt know this) so im holind my breathe and the bong is now hidin behind me and when she left they told me im like wtf!

[StoopKid]

DRUGZ R FOR THUGZ
TRIGGRZ R FOR NIGGRZ

[What Happened to the Letters?]

Originally posted by joker00@Mar 22 2006, 09:18 PM
my and my boiz was token it up and i jsut got busted 4 mj and they kepp shit goin till i got back so i go down stairs 4 were we toke it up and im sittin there wit r ghetto bong and hittin and his mom walks down and opens the door smiles and askes if we want cookies or a cake and im sittin there like im doin durgs and the only thing u got 2 say is cookies or cake (when i was busted she foudn them smokin and was ight wit it and i didnt know this) so im holind my breathe and the bong is now hidin behind me and when she left they told me im like wtf!
i go the same except it was the worst casue it was the first time i ever blazed...so its liek 2 am right my bros suppsoed to be keepign watch so i got my houd out the window and a bowl in my mouth and my friends lighting it so i can hold the bowl and the choke(i was knew gimme a break) and all i hear is my dad and my rother having a convo behidn me i turn aroudn lugns full of smoke and see my dad sittingthere i fuck dropped the bowl out the windwo and dove back into bed(dont know why he obviously saw me) and the next day the dumb bitch asks me brother if we were smoking cigarettes...what an idiot...

i got tons of toking stories liek this...

[newk_one]

toking is cool.

[FaultO]

my mom called me while i was taking a shit yesterday,.... i had to take the call.

[SMTXgraffin]

One time I was sleeping and my boxers at the time didnt have a button on them and I had morning wood and my grandma came in to wake me up.... I talked to her without knowing my dick was 7 inches out of my boxers....

I also got a handjob in the same room as my girlfriends mom.... Kind of weird...

One time i was banging the hell out of my girlfriend and i had her on the corner of the bed by the door, grandma walked in.......

[Jugga]

I could've done without the whole "7 inch" detail....
there's really no need for vivid imagery..

[kongo]

hahaha

[Kingz514]

well said jugga, well said

OH!
i dont know if i already said this

once i was wankin it at night and my bros friend came in and i couldnt get the fucking porn to close (slow comp)
and hes just like hm?

[riddleboxxmcl]

this isnt awkward but its weird......

a lillttle before winter brake i was sick and started throwin up and so i went to the nurce... i cant go home cuz i dont have aride so i had to lydown there for the day... this girl who was about 16 ( i think she was in 10th grade) walks in and puts the curten between us then i see her shirt and braw get thrown on to the top of the curtin about a minit after that all these weird bumping & suking noises (like a mechine of somesort)starts going on for about 20 minits after that the girl puts her cloths on and leaves i asked the nurce what she was doing.......she was getting her boobs pumped for milk for her baby.....

[\(SIN)/]

that mustve been awkard for the girl if she heard the nurse say that though, as shes walking out, pretty wierd though....

[joker00]

Originally posted by What Happened to the Letters?+Mar 22 2006, 09:50 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (What Happened to the Letters? @ Mar 22 2006, 09:50 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-joker00@Mar 22 2006, 09:18 PM
my and my boiz was token it up and i jsut got busted 4 mj and they kepp shit goin till i got back so i go down stairs 4 were we toke it up and im sittin there wit r ghetto bong and hittin and his mom walks down and opens the door smiles and askes if we want cookies or a cake and im sittin there like im doin durgs and the only thing u got 2 say is cookies or cake (when i was busted she foudn them smokin and was ight wit it and i didnt know this) so im holind my breathe and the bong is now hidin behind me and when she left they told me im like wtf!
i go the same except it was the worst casue it was the first time i ever blazed...so its liek 2 am right my bros suppsoed to be keepign watch so i got my houd out the window and a bowl in my mouth and my friends lighting it so i can hold the bowl and the choke(i was knew gimme a break) and all i hear is my dad and my rother having a convo behidn me i turn aroudn lugns full of smoke and see my dad sittingthere i fuck dropped the bowl out the windwo and dove back into bed(dont know why he obviously saw me) and the next day the dumb bitch asks me brother if we were smoking cigarettes...what an idiot...

i got tons of toking stories liek this... [/b][/quote]
:lol: i have a story just like it my frist teim tokin it up i had the bowl my booi lights it and i take the hit no cough 2 my amazment and his mom is knockin on the door so i exhale all the smoke and as i try 2 hide the pipe the nug falls out and hits all the leaves rite out the window so i sit down she asks him wut and and then i look out the window and i c smoke comin from the ground and i fuckin freaked cuz its on fire cuz the nug fell out and hit the leaves and started 2 burn it so his mom leaves and i jump out the window and put it all out saving the day and the nug..............needless 2 say i cleaned the nug and packed it back in and finished but it was scary 4 me :D

[Fits]

Had a treesome with my cousins girlfriend like 3 days before they started going out and he didnt kno then one nite we all got drunk i started laughing about it to him and he was like "You DID WHAAAAT!"....that was a very awkward moment

[joker00]

i was in a circle of girls and they was runnin they mouth bout somin and thne my friend comes behind me and pantsed me and then they all looked and it was very akward cuz i had an extermely delayed reaction 4 some reason so every time we aroudn they look at me different....always eyeball me werid its like suck it or fuckin stop lookin at me

[soba06]

i was goin wif me bird n sum1 pulled me trousers down in front of like he whole skool hahaha i went crazy

[SuprTnr2]

Ok, so last night we're out tagging in this really rich part of town with a lot of cops and whatnot and theyve been cracking down on writing all over town and especially drunken parties in this rich part of town and as we're walking home we run into these 4 drunk girls. So it gets to get pretty weird after awhile because we're just out there on their front yard and the girls are all over everyone, making out, hand jobbing, fignering and what not, but the best part of it is, my friends brother who was with us (he's 12), got his first blowjob :). But seriously that was one of the best nights of my life and a wee bit awkward, nothing like tagging, smoking, and finding drunk chicks and taking advantage of them all in one night :D

[dark\gbk]

Originally posted by Forum Police@Jan 13 2006, 07:14 PM
I got really drunk at school today, and during chemistry my teacher asks me to do some Lewis dots thing on the board and she asks me to write the dot thing for Boron, and I straight up said "What the FUCK is a Boron?" Then she told me to just go sit down and ended up falling out of my chair for another 15 minutes.
u lie

[Hektik-J]

Originally posted by What Happened to the Letters?+Mar 22 2006, 08:51 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (What Happened to the Letters? @ Mar 22 2006, 08:51 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Jugga@Jan 25 2006, 04:20 PM
Once, I was surfing the net, when I came across a pornography website. I usually stay away from the unholy, but I was compelled enter the site and poke around for a while. Needless to say, my efforts to prevent an erection were futile against the fantastic amalgamation of sexy Latin lesbians and battery operated clitoral stimulators. After about 16 minutes worth of discomfort due to my now-tight pantaloons and inevitable wedgie, I decided to try my hand at nullifying my situation- literally. I drew a bath, curled up with the underwear catalogue from Macy’s, and began milking the long teat. While I was going at it, my grandmother walked into the bathroom, and seemed quite hurried. Thankfully, she didn’t notice me behind the curtain, due to her haste, but what was to come was most unfortunate. She proceeded to remove her under britches, and sat on the can. For the next 10 minutes, I witnessed the single most horrific event I’ve ever had to witness- my grandmother taking a dump. I, in all my disgust, was forced to keep quite and bare the smell of charbroiled broccoli that filled the room because I still had a chub going on, although it was rapidly declining. After spewing the horrific sounds of flatulencies and words of distress fit for a sailor, she stood up, flushed, and began to de-robe for a shower. In a fit of desperation, I jumped out of the bathtub, still holding the catalogue, and ran passed my now-naked grandma on my way out the door. That night, I skipped dinner.
this is teh single greatest story ive ever heard...hahaha...and i thought mine was akward... [/b][/quote]
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: that is the best story i have evr read. hahahaha

[Jugga]

apparently its a "classic"..

[joker00]

^yeah i laughed that must have really ben a bad memory


who told the 1 bout his friend in the shower playin wit himself cuz i was liek cryin i laughed so fuckin hard

[vman]

............

[HÃœK DUP]

Originally posted by joker00@Mar 25 2006, 11:12 PM
who told the 1 bout his friend in the shower playin wit himself cuz i was liek cryin i laughed so fuckin hard
I posted it, but it wasn't my story, it was from another forum I visit. I loved it too, I laughed so hard just trying to imagine the whole thing.

[Forum Police]

Originally posted by dark\gbk+Mar 25 2006, 06:31 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (dark\gbk @ Mar 25 2006, 06:31 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Forum Police@Jan 13 2006, 07:14 PM
I got really drunk at school today, and during chemistry my teacher asks me to do some Lewis dots thing on the board and she asks me to write the dot thing for Boron, and I straight up said "What the FUCK is a Boron?" Then she told me to just go sit down and ended up falling out of my chair for another 15 minutes.
u lie [/b][/quote]
People sure like to not believe this story...

My teacher doesn't care if we swear, just in moderation.

I didn't COMPLETELY fall out of my chair, because our desks are so close together if I fall to the left (which I was) I would just fall onto the top of the girl's desk next to me.


She obviously knew I was drunk too, if she cared I would've been sent to the discipline office.

[Forum Police]

Originally posted by more_soup?@Mar 15 2006, 04:58 PM
so i got my gf bent over on my bed naked (my bedroom is in the basement) and my sister opens the door and comes down the stairs so i just sit down and slip my dick in my shorts and she just covers herslef wiht the blanket shitty deal was i was busting a nut as i put my shit awayanyway my sister gets down the stairs smiles at me and i kinda gave her this sketchy smile (trying to keep a staight face when your busting a nut isnt easy) and then she just grabbed some shit of out the freezer and went back upstairs...didnt relize a thing...
Sounds like you've got the same laid out basement as me.

[Raze_and_blaze]

This one time Im with these 3 people I know 2 girls and a guy and we are sitting on the guys porch getting high.Its about 12 o clock and I am high out of my mind and kind of tired so I decide to lay back.Next thing I know one of the girls starts sticking her hands down my pants so I look up and I say WTF?So she stops so I go back to laying down and she does it again but this time I dont say anything so then I get a handjob and I bust a nut.We then went on as if nothing happened.

What is so awkward about this you ask?

I got a handjob in front of two people. :blink:
I also rode the bus with them to school.

Also Me and a one of my friends was high and we jump over a rope and look at each other and start laughing.Weird I know

[joker00]

^wtf! that just sounds like a good night nottin aqward im not the 1 2 be talkin but still........another story plz

[SMTXgraffin]

Originally posted by joker00@Mar 22 2006, 09:18 PM
my and my boiz was token it up and i jsut got busted 4 mj and they kepp shit goin till i got back so i go down stairs 4 were we toke it up and im sittin there wit r ghetto bong and hittin and his mom walks down and opens the door smiles and askes if we want cookies or a cake and im sittin there like im doin durgs and the only thing u got 2 say is cookies or cake (when i was busted she foudn them smokin and was ight wit it and i didnt know this) so im holind my breathe and the bong is now hidin behind me and when she left they told me im like wtf!
My bestbro's mom loves it when I come over because she says that my weed makes her house smell the best out of the rest of the peoples sacks..... still blowin' that funk. She doesn't like to smoke it but she says it smells beautiful.

[Raze_and_blaze]

This one time I was with my brother and his girlfriend and his gfs cousin (a female in case you were wonderin)(fine as hell also) was there also.My brother and his girlfriend start fuking so the cousin wants to ride ATVs so I said okay. There was only one ATV though. So we get outside and I say "whos gonna drive"and she wanted to drive and I had no objection. So we start driving (keep in mind this is a small ATV) and shes sittin on my lap and we are hitting the bumps etc. etc. So like Jugga my efforts to prevent an erection were futile.I know she had to have felt it because she looked back at me and started smiling.I acted as If nothing happened. For some reason that is awkward.

And yes weed is beautiful

[screw_loose]

this thread still exists? haha

[Kao.Ali]

ummm, i was at a party dancin with a girl, and i thought i heard her fart on me, i wasnt sure because the music was slappin hard, but she turned around all nervous and shit like she farted. and althought she had just done that i couldnt help but laugh. but after ten seconds it was just really akward, so i left her to dance with another girl. and a week later my boys and i were on the bus and she got on and sat right next to us

[Raze_and_blaze]

You must have been hallucienating because women never fart.

[benz88]

Originally posted by Raze_and_blaze@Mar 27 2006, 08:26 PM
You must have been hallucienating because women never fart.
word, they quife(sp)

[cess!]

they do both actually

[STRIFE]

Originally posted by Jugga@Jan 18 2006, 07:18 PM
I got more...
unfortunately...



I remember it as it was yesterday: 1994 was quite the eventful year. I was 5 at the time, and not much was going on in my social life (as if to say the scar tissue on my wrists tells a different tale of the years to come). One distinct memory of that fanciful era in my life was the day my grandmother made a dreaded discovery. As she cleaned my room, she found a pair of soiled under britches hidden in the back of my sock drawer. What a catastrophe. I tried to play it off as if I didn’t put it there. I told her I was helping a friend out by hiding them there for a few days until things blew over with his mom, but she wasn’t buying it. She gave me scat and jive talk for it, but I lived to see another day; I was soon to discover this was much to my disadvantage. A few days after that, I went to take a shower but my mother was in the bathroom across the hall from where I slept. “No big deal,‿ I thought, and decided to take my bathing and grooming to my grandmother’s bathroom. This was a huge mistake, for what I saw still makes it’s appearance in my dreams on restless nights. My grandmother had soiled under britches of her own soaking in the sink. That day, I died a little on the inside.
funny as i just get done reading that, my mom throws a pair of my underwear on the computer desk.......i got quiet for a sec

[Jugga]

were they soiled?



that would indeed be awkward...

[dcite]

Originally posted by Raze_and_blaze@Mar 27 2006, 08:37 PM
This one time I was with my brother and his girlfriend and his gfs cousin (a female in case you were wonderin)(fine as hell also) was there also.My brother and his girlfriend start fuking so the cousin wants to ride ATVs so I said okay. There was only one ATV though. So we get outside and I say "whos gonna drive"and she wanted to drive and I had no objection. So we start driving (keep in mind this is a small ATV) and shes sittin on my lap and we are hitting the bumps etc. etc. So like Jugga my efforts to prevent an erection were futile.I know she had to have felt it because she looked back at me and started smiling.I acted as If nothing happened. For some reason that is awkward.

And yes weed is beautiful
hahaha

i once went on a little internet-browsing-expedition for some pictures of things such as the ones that exist in our HOT GIRLS thread, only to realize that my sisters friend lay sleeping on the couch in the same room. i hope she was asleep the whole time..

[Skyhopper]

One time, I walked in on my friend's mom shaving her pubes.. well, I technically didn't walk in on her, 'cause she left the bathroom door open...

[gnarlatron3030]

now that's awkward^^

[Raze_and_blaze]

I experience my mom giving birth to my half sister. :blink: I am only 14

[pyro-bandit]

my akward moment was recent i had just put up a tag and the next night i showed a close friend she all of a sudden bustes out laughing when we get back to our cars the reason being was that my tag was a block away from the police department talk about freaking akward

[dcite]

thats not awkward at all

[pyro-bandit]

felt akward to me

[Jugga]

I'ma have to go with dcite on this one....

[SeKs]

Hollyyy shit.

Jugga, i wanna hear more!

Your grandmother must hate you....

[joker00]

^not hate him but feel extremely werid when things get quiet and they are i nthe same room........or goin down memory lane 2getha

[OnwaMatra]

Grandma taking a dump story is fucking priceless.
Awkward? uuh...
Was sitting on a curb downtown, sketching and taking in the scene, when suddenly this homeless man (silent with a creepy smile) walks right in front of me and just drops his pants. Had a solid 5sec of mounting horror to realize that I was staring at hobo peen. After the deer-in-headlights phase, I realized things could only get worse, so I grabbed my backpack and left.

Hm.. maybe not -so- awkward, compared to other things.. but definately a "wtf" moment..

[Proper]

Jugga, you and your grandmother have had some interesting moments.

[Skyhopper]

one time, I was in Mexico at my grandpa's house and my grandma was in the bathroom and my cousin needed to go, and I saw him walk towards him, and instead of telling him she was in there, I just watched and wanted to see what would happen. The look on his face when he came out was that of horror. I think we both felt our innocence corrupt that day.

[Torrent]

Maybe not very awkward but very hard while trying not to laugh.

I was bombing with one of the guys in my krew. Just keep in mind we're both filipino. We go to a diner and are eating out side when this homeless person comes up to us and is like "Look at this. Watch carefully at these birds. Isn't it funny that they give these birds more food than me." He was just about the craziest guy I've ever met. "Yes I am the modern day Jesus and I will be crucified!" And he was yelling all this at us. We were trying our hardest not to laugh. "And the God Vermin, or you might call it the Government but I call it the God Vermin, have knocked up my daughter. Oh yeah they fucked her hard. REALLY HARD!" Yelling all this as children and their parents walk by. The best part though was this. Keep in mind we're both filipino. He says "And make sure, you preach my message, Espeachilly you *Points to my friend* with your mexican heritage." I damn near lost it then. It was just so funny. I love homeless people.

[settybomb]

I dont have a radio or any music in my car. So the ride is scilence aside from my engine.
With that being said, i did this girl i barely knew at a party, and her and I fucking hated eachother up until that point. SO i wake up the next day to her, and im about to leave and shes like," Oh can i get a ride home? i live at whereever and its only a few minutes away from your area"
And i'll admit it, i felt guilty just thinking about not giving her a ride home, so i was like, of course come on.
So we get into my car and i start driving her home.
And then it becomes the most dry awkward ride of my life. Turns out, this broad lives an hour from my where we were driving. So i rode in scilence with her just like, looking at me asking me questions here and there that i had no idea how to answer.
"So what do we do about last night?"
"So, how should we go about this?"
"Should we date?"
after a series of "I dont know's" and "Um...i don think so's"
so after this continues i get off her exit and begin to think im in the clear.
then she says it.....
"Im suprised youve never been to my boyfriends house, he has partys all the time."
at that moment i was like, oh jesus christ man. IM fucked.
i drop her off at this dudes house and hes out front working on his truck.
I just got the fuck out of there and havent spoken to anyone affiliated with her since.
Im sure that dident sound awkward, but let met tell you this, Ive never felt soooo outof place as i did when i dropped her off.
And thats my awkward story, which isnt as funny as a granmad taking a dump.

[syrup2]

so i was taking a piss behind this wall and there was this shiny ass door that i didnt notice before and so suddenly the door opens and it turns out it was an elvator for the bart staion i was behind and i accdently piss on the guy

[Kao.Ali]

Originally posted by Torrent@Apr 9 2006, 11:41 PM
Maybe not very awkward but very hard while trying not to laugh.

I was bombing with one of the guys in my krew. Just keep in mind we're both filipino. We go to a diner and are eating out side when this homeless person comes up to us and is like "Look at this. Watch carefully at these birds. Isn't it funny that they give these birds more food than me." He was just about the craziest guy I've ever met. "Yes I am the modern day Jesus and I will be crucified!" And he was yelling all this at us. We were trying our hardest not to laugh. "And the God Vermin, or you might call it the Government but I call it the God Vermin, have knocked up my daughter. Oh yeah they fucked her hard. REALLY HARD!" Yelling all this as children and their parents walk by. The best part though was this. Keep in mind we're both filipino. He says "And make sure, you preach my message, Espeachilly you *Points to my friend* with your mexican heritage." I damn near lost it then. It was just so funny. I love homeless people.
yay for filipinos....
people randomly speak spanish to me or ask me what part of south america im from, shit is annoying

[Tye]

One time I was tagging a wal mart bathroom and me being a dumb ass did not lock the stall and this guy walks in he sees me and says he wont say anything and i said thanks and left then i ran into him in the store and there was a real wierd pause then i quickley walked away.

[RezOner..]

I farted meeting my girlfriends dad

[PeeInTheShower]

this thread seems like the best...


i went to camp with this chick a long time ago. long story short, i ended up chillin' at her house one night and i slept over. this girl was convinced i was her boyfriend and shit. we fucked, as well as me taking her virginity... and we end up having a talk with her mom the next morning, about her trashy cousin who had a baby out of relationship... her mom then says "thats why everyone should wait until they're married to have sex.." the girl gives me a passing glance, her mother catches on... the mom's like "what's going on?.... guuyss?... WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT LOOK FOR?"...

talk about awkward. i denied it til the end

[JETPACK!!]

last night i was paintin with this chick (she writes too) and were hittin this overpass. then this couple hops the fence under the pass, sneaks up. pitches a tent and start having sex. they didnt even notice us.

its kinna hard to paint when all you hear is moaning and giggling. their tent got tagged.

[Slushi]

That sounds like a simple zen story

[PeeInTheShower]

true.

[Enmity]

i cant think of one that's recent .. but i can remember one from awhile back and this is true ...

while in college .. i was at a party ..really fuckin fucked up drunk as hell could have never walked home or drove if my life depended on it... in a house with like 3 girls that i had fucked already (akward) cause i was spittin game to other bitches while i got 3 of them mean muggin... and one of them was with her new "man" some dipshit who i didnt know and...hes talkin to me buddy buddy ..completely unaware that i just banged his bitch like 2 weeks ago ...i thought it was fuckin funny ... my roommate (my ride) left me stranded and one of my two sluts.. offered to give me a ride home only if would fuck her ( i really didnt want to really i straight up hated this bitch. i was tired of this hoe.. i told myself that if i fucked her i was def gonna dog this bitch out like straight up ass to mouth slappin her with my cock chokeing the bitch shit thinkin im gonna teach her a lesson asking to get fucked like this.... i was thinking to myself oohh god the things i have to do to get a ride home) .. so i went home and fucked her like she was the last twat on earth . then told her to get the fuck out of my house . which she did....

strange thing was .. she loved it .. she loved every bit.. and ever since that night she would propose me this offer if she noticed that my ride left or if i was alone somewhere during a party..

ill give you a ride home if you fuck me .

never did again though .. never ever ever ever did again.

why ?

....i hated her that much

[JETPACK!!]

better than giving gas money.

[PeeInTheShower]

sounds like bullshit to me, unless that hoe was butt ugly.

[WoeInfinite]

when your walking with someone, tellin a personal story, and you turn around, and its someone else..
or someone your talking about..

orr...when your fucking doggy style, and shes FUCKING LOUDDDD
and your mom knocks on the door...
that always sucks..
=.=

[silentchaos14]

I farted meeting my girlfriends dad

bump

i laughed so fuckin hard at this

[Cadaver]

bump

i laughed so fuckin hard at this

hahahahahhahahah!!
i farted once in a car full of drunk people...i blamed it on someone else ;D

[moosekee]

that shits funny, i remember i was driving around wid my boys once and i put up all the windows and put the window lock on farted (nasty ass fuck i couldnt even stand the smell myself) and yo that shit was fucking hillarious one of my boys almost puked wow lmao

[Scheme*119]

i was fucking this dude in the ass and he turns around and kisses me, WHAT A FAGGOT

[Cadaver]

that shits funny, i remember i was driving around wid my boys once and i put up all the windows and put the window lock on farted (nasty ass fuck i couldnt even stand the smell myself) and yo that shit was fucking hillarious one of my boys almost puked wow lmao

hahahahhahah!!!!!
good thing my fart didnt stink that much...
(a friend spilled wine in the car, the driver was pissed hardcore)

[dave the pirate]

homeless masturbation is all i have to say.

[Cadaver]

oh fuck that reminds me...
i have a sql mate that took out his cock in the middle of the class many times..
one time i was sitting with him and talking to a dude in the next desk, and i turn back to him, and he had his cock out and he was playing with him...
i fel off my chair and started loling hardcore
and so did he:D

[G-Fat]

mexican food + elevator


do the math, i played it off tho

[Scheme*119]

dead albino + church

do the math, i played it off though.

[DaBluntHead]

well its not much but
a while ago i was waiting for the bus in line and there was this old sick-lookin-kind of chinese lady but she was cute in her ugliness , like a cute old sick-lookin-kind chinese lady. As I was patiently waiting , I take out my beat out of my ears to use my cellphone and then i hear, coming from the chinese bitch, the most disgusting and stinky fart ive ever heard/smelled
IN MY LIFE.
Everybody noticed it ,like I could see it in their shocked figures but nobody said something ....ANYTHING.
It was quite amusing at first , but the stinkiness caught up quick

[LUCIFER_RISING]

ahh^
thats fucking gross
asians that is

[LostYouth]

hahahahahahaha
this thread is great
my whole life is a awkard moment
recently i guess
i was staring at this girl cause she was fine
and she was like what

[ErrorOner...]

^^shoulda said "huh? sorry i didnt hear you cuz i was entranced by your beauty" or something slick like that. i guess you just ain't as slick as Slick Rick.

[ILikeBombing]

1st awkward moment that i can think of: (laying on our sides) giving my ex anal in the living room, and then looking behind me and realising her sister was on the couch behind us watching tv and the tv was infront of us then me awkwardly looking at her, and giving her a smile, as she looks at me gives me a death stare and then soon looks away.
shes hated me ever since.

2nd that i can think of:
having your dad walk in on your tugging off.
(it happend about 3 years ago)
he didnt even look or talk to me for about a week. literally.

[LostYouth]

1st awkward moment that i can think of: (laying on our sides) giving my ex anal in the living room, and then looking behind me and realising her sister was on the couch behind us watching tv and the tv was infront of us then me awkwardly looking at her, and giving her a smile, as she looks at me gives me a death stare and then soon looks away.
shes hated me ever since.

2nd that i can think of:
having your dad walk in on your tugging off.
(it happend about 3 years ago)
he didnt even look or talk to me for about a week. literally.
haha
we have all been caughtin spankin it
but usually you can cover yourself
were you like full blown out caught?
cause thats what it sounds like
idk im jus curious
and how old was her lil sister?

[ILikeBombing]

haha
we have all been caughtin spankin it
but usually you can cover yourself
were you like full blown out caught?
cause thats what it sounds like
idk im jus curious
and how old was her lil sister?

were you like full blown out caught? yes.

and how old was her lil sister? it was her OLDER sister. at the time this happend she was 19 haha.

that moment on she called me a sleaze and always bad mouthed me, and never wanted me staying over.

i felt like saying "Geez sorry your sister wanted me to fuck her in the ass"

but yeah, them moments = very awkward.
but funny when you look back on it

[Subconcious]

I do this guy's college work for him cuz he needs the credits but ain't really good at math n shit, so I was at his house one day doin the work on his pooter and I was pretty sure he was gay, but it would've been awkward to say anything so I never really knew... so anyway I was doin the work and he stopped talking and shit so I just glance over to see what was up... and he was laying down in the couch under his blanket just staring at me. I did a double-take like "WTF?" and he just looked at me and said nothing. I shifted uncomfortably and continued the work and then I think he fell asleep, but to make a long story short, I told him that he bugged the fuck out of me and I'm not doin his Statistics anymore...

[RezOner..]

Oh oh oh. Wasn't really awkward... Just kinda weird.

I was really drunk at this kids house and i was pissing and I pissed on his face towel.

[Scheme*119]

"im pregnant"

[PeeInTheShower]

congrats. does this mean you'll wear pants that fit you now?

[Scheme*119]

see those quotation marks?

[PeeInTheShower]

Nah.

[RezOner..]

"im pregnant"

Werd the fuck up.

[Scheme*119]

shucks, theyre some pretty tight quotation marks

[PeeInTheShower]

i'm telling you. i see no quotation marks.

[Scheme*119]

i know man, i know, it sucks, but if you did, youd be like "WHAT!?"


theyre intense

[PeeInTheShower]

niggha fuck my peepee.

[Scheme*119]

Why would you say that? do you and your peepee have beef?

[PeeInTheShower]

lulz. scheme you never fail to make me lawl.

[RezOner..]

Man simple zen shut the fuck up

[Scheme*119]

Thanks bro, i aim to please, my job here is done, im getting off now, peace.

[PeeInTheShower]

Man simple zen shut the fuck up

hey you.

yay! im simple zen! look at me!

[RezOner..]

k






I said I fuck corpses and I don't give a fuck today, and the priest of my school was right behind me. Got a dentention.

[LostYouth]

this page has been pure comedy

[Subconcious]

the first 15 minutes of Quarantine

[anti-anti-crime]

the time when the guy on the camera turned the mic on and the girl heard the guy saying he could fuck her by the end of the day. in quarenteen ofcourse. that shit would be awkward. i would fuck her though

[Subconcious]

lewlz^ yes, very bangable

[thaEEZYway]

most awkard situation ever,
i walked in on my sisters boyfriend making out with another dude.
i just walked right out, wondering what the fuck my sister is thinking

[moosekee]

so it was my freshman year in high school and we are in P.E class and the coach said get down to the push up position, at this time of age i thought females didnt fart or shit, well that day opened my eyes to real life! the girl next to me was hot, and i would flirt wid her and she would too, well she was next to me and everyone is quiet doing push up and next thing i know she ripped one! holy shit, lmao i looked around and i stare at her and she glanced at me and says "what? it was me, you've never heard a girl fart before?" lmao i just looked away laughed and kept doing my push ups..... but everytime i would see her it was ackward...

another one was when i was little and i discovered my penis! well i noticed that if i pet it, it felt good and one day i was watching tv (im from south america by the way) so i see porn on the tv and i see the guy drilling this chick and i was like that looks like fun, well i pulled down my pants and started humping the mattress like an insane chihuahua or how ever you fucking spell it.... and next thing i know MY GRANDMA' WALKS IN!! omg i still remember her face, she was real weird for a while then she got over it. or so i think lmao

[LostYouth]

that reminds of of Not Another Teen movie at the beggining when shes splooges all over the grandma and the priest is there and shit
hahaha

[MAST]

i was chillin on my porch standin up smokin with my friend. and for some reason on this day i was wearing a somewhat short shirt. back in these days i wore my pants low as hell and never wore belts. but i was chillin there facing him talkin to him, and i look down and notice that the hole on my boxers was in plain view and was wide open with my junk half sticking out. i immediately fixed the problem before he saw.

[IlikePie]

Haha, that happened quite often when I would walk around the house just boxers.

I was at this girl's house party and the girl who lived there said me and my (ex) girlfriend could have her parents room. We start doing our thing, and I'm drunk so I'm like, might as well go down on her. And the way the room is set up, they have like a window thing so you can see down into the living room. But I'm eating her out, and shes moaning and all that usual shit, and out of nowhere, she screams, "It's like an ocean!" It gets dead silent downstairs, and I just start laughing. Long story short, I came.

After said party, the girl who threw the party got caught for it 'cuz all the liquor was gone, I left my condom in her parents room, and I guess we fucked on her mom's night gown, and it smelled like sex.

[LostYouth]

hahaha
"Its like an ocean"????
go job on the leaving the condom there 2

[umop 3pisdn]

ok so in my house, the front door is at the beginning of this hallway, and the hallway is east-west, so like, the sun comes right through the door if it was open. Well i have windows on either side, so the sun shines through at around 7pm, and it shines onto this overhead chandiler thingy for lack of a better word, and it creates some cool reflections. so im in the living room, and i have to cross the hallway to get to the bathroom.

Well, i usually start to unbutton my pants when i head to the bathroom, and when i did this time, my pants just started falling, and you know when you walk with pants around your ankles, you do fast choppy steps? well i thought i looked like a choo choo train, so i started doing the pumpy thing with my arms, simulating a train. and im crossin this hallway like a train, and i get to the bathroom, do my thang, and im walking back to my couch, when i see my mom standing at the front door. im like "yo moms whats hood?" and she just looks at me.

turns out she was standing at the front door, looking at the chandiler, and saw me choo choo train past, without me noticing. it was actually fucking hilarious, and how she didnt bust out laughing at me, ill never know.

[letsg0skate]

ha like less then a month ago I was just chilling at my friends house who has a pretty hot mom and this third kid is like soooo would you do his mom I was like I already have so loud and theres like a very thin wall between the living room and kitchen and she walks out and just looks at me and says nothing and walks away it was soooooo awkward

[Proper]

most awkard situation ever,
i walked in on my sisters boyfriend making out with another dude.
i just walked right out, wondering what the fuck my sister is thinking


Lolololol! Your sister is attracted to homosexuals!

This ginger kid, from my ex-High School, said he was masturbating (violently, mind you) and his mother walked into his room without knocking and caught him stroking his salami. Now, whenever they are watching a movie together and theres a reference to masturbation or nudity, it's the most awkward situation, ever.

I'd have to concur with that.

[sketch_three]

back when i went to school me an some guys were talking about fucking this hot teachers assistant,

then someon said what about miss brown(really really fat teacher)
and i started screamin shit and goin'' ud get altitude sickness if u were on top,
and sufforcate if she was''
my frend did that old joke saying shes behind you but i crried on...
after a good 5 minutes i here someone cleaar her throat...
guese who

[MontanaPainter]

lulz pwned with the mighty stick of awkwardness

[WoeInfinite]

most awkard situation ever,
i walked in on my sisters boyfriend making out with another dude.
i just walked right out, wondering what the fuck my sister is thinking

...are they still dating..like, did you tell her?
ahaha

tonight im in my girlfriends basement, and we just fucked, and we walked upstairs so i could peace, and as soon as i open the door, her mom walks outta her bedroom, and we just had that awkward like 2 second pause and look at eachother...then "ohh i gotta leave, bye"
and she just shook her head at me haha.

[Thrice]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BUeYBbO5oM

[Slushi]

I went to see the 40 year old virgin with my mom, I was 13 or 14 at the time.

[Batman_Onest]

back when i went to school me an some guys were talking about fucking this hot teachers assistant,

then someon said what about miss brown(really really fat teacher)
and i started screamin shit and goin'' ud get altitude sickness if u were on top,
and sufforcate if she was''
my frend did that old joke saying shes behind you but i crried on...
after a good 5 minutes i here someone cleaar her throat...
guese who
I would have turned around and said "what the fuck do you want?"

[MontanaPainter]

she would of gone all chewbacca on yo ass foo

[gunsofbrooklyn]

handjob in the movie theater
my science teacher sitting infront of me.. sees me and starts talking while im gettin my shit jacked
fucked up

[bountyhunter113]

^lol

This guy shit his pants while sitting next to me on the bus...

[gunsofbrooklyn]

HAHA some guy on friday got on the bus wearing a hockey helmet and kept hitting stuff with his head and the driver kicked him off

[Flash_One]

HAHA some guy on friday got on the bus wearing a hockey helmet and kept hitting stuff with his head and the driver kicked him off

lmfao

[LostYouth]

handjob in the movie theater
my science teacher sitting infront of me.. sees me and starts talking while im gettin my shit jacked
fucked up
this strangley is de ja vu for me
my friend told me a story like this once
haha
little awkard moments keep happening to me like at school i will pass someone and they will look at me and i will look at them and were both like what the fuck u starin at
idk, really hard to explain, but its really uncomfortable
haha

[MAST]

my ex's old best friend is a goody goody, and used to hate me when i was dating said ex, because she thought i was the biggest druggie in the world. now, whenever i pass the girl in the halls, we always get caught in this weird staring/half-smiling thing and it's just really awkward..







she's cute as hell though.

[sketch_three]

well then just igore her face and star at said chest

[ILikeBombing]

ignore her chest and stare at her ass

[phre1]

so one day i beat the shit out of this dude from my year...both sent to the office and we had to sit beside each other and i was like...no hard fellings

[MontanaPainter]

no, you didn't
I'm in my schol office right now lulz

[nero112]

gaay

[theorist]

freshmen year i walk into the bathroom during passing period i walk in the urinal and my health teacher didnt lock it so i walk in on him taking a dump

this is one of my friends awkward situations
My friend walks into the bathroom during class and some kid i jackin off in the corner urinal. My friend is like "WTF?!" the kid turns around and says "im getting 20 bucks to cum in my hand then wipe on the science room wall, but i cant get off" my friend then just leaves like nothing happened lol

and another one of a different friend.
alright so one of my friends really wants to get with one of my other friends but lately my other friend was saying that he lost interest in my other friend and he said he was done trying to get with her, but there still friends though. so last week theyre just chillen at his house and my other friend well she falls asleep to take a nap and she drifts in and out of sleep once in awhile and she thinks shes just having a wierd dream of my firned petting her arm and hair saying stuff like "i love you" and that sort of stuff after awhile she realizes its not a dream but tries to avoid the situation by pretending to be asleep so when winter break is over and school starts again...damn i cant wait to see what goes on cuz my friend who was petting her is unaware that she knows