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Thread: Randomism

  1. #3801

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  2. #3802
    _ ^_^.:.H3@5.:.
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    Originally posted by Whoa@Jan 9 2005, 01:38 PM

    I have the same keyboard...
    hehe

  3. #3803

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    i want a bbq but tis 7.45pm and raining

  4. #3804

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    Originally posted by sika_2002@Jan 9 2005, 02:42 PM
    i want a bbq but tis 7.45pm and raining
    where the fuck do you live?

    Its 2h45 pm and its snowing here :lol:


    are you like in russia?

  5. #3805
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    why are you worried about WHERE he lives? im wondering WHEN. the motherfucker said "tis"!
    WORD IS BOND.

  6. #3806
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    hahaha tis the time to be jolly falalalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
    <span style=\'color:skyblue\'>
    [<span style=\'colorrange\'>CLICK CLICK ME&#33;&#33;</span>]
    ------514 reprezent&#33;------
    [C]reating [A]rtistik [C]haos
    </span></div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE (mr. she77)</td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>waste will you be my best friend?</td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE (msfyt)</td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>&quot;the last thing you need is more attention&quot;
    *closed* </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>

  7. #3807

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    Originally posted by FOEone@Jan 9 2005, 02:56 PM
    why are you worried about WHERE he lives? im wondering WHEN. the motherfucker said "tis"&#33;
    :lol: i just noticed that

    pouhahaha

    tis not ye who shall be hung :lol:
    why did i say that

  8. #3808

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    Down hurrr We getz all ta fungy shick&#39;n rublin owt are stumacks. (hick accent.)

    12:15. THE STROKES. AIM. HUGS. PROVE.
    <span style=\'colorrange\'><span style=\'font-size:14pt;line-height:100%\'>Click &quot;Close&quot; button to close the above topic <u>OR</u> to Erase the above user&#39;s account...</span></span>

  9. #3809

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    hahahah, i meant "its". and im from england.

  10. #3810
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    lol i know, we&#39;re just fucking with you.

    im american, and i sometimes find myself saying "aye" for yes and "fag" for cigarette. it must be that irish blood.




    ...or whiskey. whichever.
    WORD IS BOND.

  11. #3811

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    lol, i always say "aye" just because its a nice words. its most probably a combination of the irish blood and whiskey

  12. #3812

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    like my new sig on this conversation? lol

  13. #3813

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    haha, i like it, u gota mention who its about.....ME

  14. #3814

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    yep, you&#39;re the star of the show.

  15. #3815

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    lol, i was joking.

  16. #3816

  17. #3817

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    so was i.


    do you honestly think I would put YOUR name in MY sig?&#33;

































    j/k

  18. #3818

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    that squirrel is CRAZY&#33;&#33;&#33;

  19. #3819

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    :angry: :angry: :angry:

  20. #3820

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    Originally posted by the_uniBOMBER@Jan 9 2005, 12:00 AM
    It looks like alot of reading but these jokes are all really funny. I took the time to type this all for you, atleast have the courtesy to read them.


    A Texan walks into a bar in Alaska and sits down at the bar and starts to talk to the bar tender. Now he&#39;s sitting there bragging about how much money he makes off oil and how many head of cattle he has at his ranch back in Texas and how much of a big shot he is and how he&#39;s an honorary member of each state. So this goes on for hours and the bar tender is getting sick of hearing this guy talk so he says "Shut up and listen. Do you want to be an honorary Alaskan?" "Well sure" the guy responds "I&#39;m an honory member of-" "Shut up, do you want to be an honorary Alaskan or not?" the bar tender interupts. "Yes" replies the texan. "Ok then here&#39;s what you have to do. First You have to drink a gallon of whiskey. Second you have to kill a polar bear. Thirdly you have to make love to an eskimo women. Not necessarily in that order and you have 24 hours to do this and come back here with some proof and we&#39;ll make you an honorary Alaskan. We&#39;ll give you a certificate and tell the mayor and everthing." So the texan accepts and says "Well since i&#39;m in a bar I guess i&#39;d best to the gallon of whiskey first." So the bar tender brings out a gallon of whiskey and the texan downs it as fast as he can. He then stands up and passes out . A few hours later he wakes up and walks out of the door. "I&#39;ll, I&#39;ll, I&#39;ll be r-right back" he slurs. 15 hours later he returns and he&#39;s torn to shit&#33; He&#39;s covered in blood, his clothes are completely torn up, he&#39;s missing an arm and he&#39;s limping. The bartender is staring at him in disbelief when the Texan speaks up and asks "Where&#39;s that eskimo women you wanted me to kill?"



    Two men are sitting in a bar talking and one asks the other "So how&#39;d that date of yours go, ya know the one you had the other day?". " Oh just horrible" the second guy responds" Just awful". "Well why, what happened?" inquires the first guy "You&#39;ve always said you&#39;ve had great dates with this girl in the past?". "Well the food was good, the movie was good, and the dancing was good but when we got back to her place we started to fool around and just as we were getting ready to hit the sack she says to me "The only way you&#39;ll be able to have me is if you give me 9 inches and make me bleed"" he says. " Well that&#39;s awful. What did you do?". "Well I fucked her three times and broke her nose".


    A Scotsman, an Irishman, and a Newfie are exploring the new world of Canada. So they&#39;re having a good time when one night while they&#39;re asleep they are ambushed and captured by a group of natives. So they&#39;re taken back to their village and presented infront of the chief. "You have tresspassed on our sacred land and for this we are going to kill you. You will first suffer greatly then die a horrible death. Take them away" says the chief. "Wait&#33;" yells the shaman suddenly " Chief, it&#39;s our holy season. Should we atleast give them some dignity?" So the cheif considers it and says " You&#39;re right. We&#39;ll allow you to either take your own life or we will skin you alive and use your skin to make canoes." Well needless to say, the three guys are scared. "Well..." the Scotsman speaks up " I sure as hell don&#39;t want to be skined alive so i&#39;ll take my own life. Give me a knife". So one of the natives hands him his hunting knife and the Scotsman takes it. "For Scotland, in all its glory&#33;" he yells and plunges the knife into his heart. So they drag his dead body off. "I won&#39;t be quite as enthusiastic as he was, but i&#39;ll also take my own life. Give me a knife." says the Irishman. So once again he&#39;s handed a knife. "For Ireland&#33;" then he says something in gaelic and plunges the knife into his heart and he is also dragged off to have his flesh made into a canoe. The natives then round on the Newfie who says " Well I really don&#39;t want to be skinned alive. That would hurt like a damn. So I will take my life but I want a fork". Taken aback the natives all look at each other then hand him a fork. "I&#39;ll take my own life but you&#39;re not making a fucking canoe out of me&#33;" and he just starts stabbing himself all over with the fork.

    Out in the middle of the desert in an old west town there&#39;s a bar reserved only for the toughest coyboys of the old west. So one day in walks a cowboy who is a little smaller than the others and dresses a little differently. So he sits down at the bar. "What&#39;ll it be?" asks the bar tender in his most menacing voice. "Hmmm.... Well.... I don&#39;t know... Do you have a fuzzy navel?" asks the little cowboy. "What?&#33;" yells the bartender. " Well then maybe a rum and coke? I don&#39;t know something sweet." cowers the little cowboy. "You queer?" the bartender asks "Cause we don&#39;t serve queers here". "Look" the little cowboy says timidly "I&#39;ve been out in the hot sun for days and i&#39;m very thirsty. I don&#39;t want any trouble, I just want my drink. I&#39;ll pay whatever you want." "Whatever I want? Fine. But i&#39;m charging you &#036;25 for this drink and you have to sit at the far end of the bar and I don&#39;t want to hear a thing out of you. You just sit, drink your drink, and then leave. Got it?" . "Yeah yeah that&#39;s fine" the little cowboy says so he takes his drink, pays the bartender and goes and sits at the far end of the bar. Not long after a gigantic cowboy bursts through the doors of the bar. 7 feet tall and 3 feet wide, all muscle. He slams his bull whip down at the bar, pulls the bartender over and says "I&#39;ve been out in the middle of no where, in the cow shit, in the dust, and the heat for three days. I&#39;m so thirsty. Give me the biggest mug of beer you&#39;ve got. Actually just put a hose in the keg and pour it down my throat&#33; I&#39;m so thirsty I could suck the balls off a bull right through his mouth&#33;" "Well moo moo bucaroo" pipes the little cowboy.

    What&#39;s the difference between pimples and a catholic priest?
    The pimples wait till you&#39;re thirteen before they come on your face.

    I&#39;ve got more but right now I have to treat my newly acquired Carpal tunnel syndrome.
    Bump for good jokes no one read.


 

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