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Thread: Jokes...

  1. #301
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    a man enters a pun contest, and writes 10 differant puns and submits them all, hopeing atleast one will win. well, no pun in ten did.


  2. #302
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    You gotta love this guy.....
    This is a true story about a recent wedding that took place at Clemson
    University. It was in the local newspaper and even Jay Leno mentioned it.

    It was a huge wedding with about 300 guests. After the wedding at the
    reception, the groom got up on stage with a microphone to talk to the
    crowd. He said he wanted to thank everyone for coming, many from long
    distances, to support them at their wedding.

    He especially wanted to thank the bride's and his family and to thank his
    new father-in-law for providing such a lavish reception.

    As a token of his deep appreciation he said he wanted to give everyone a
    special gift just from him. So taped to the bottom of everyone's chair,
    including the wedding party, was a manila envelope. He said this was his
    gift to everyone,and asked them to open their envelope.

    Inside each manila envelope was an 8x10 glossy of his bride having sex
    with
    the best man. The groom had gotten suspicious of them weeks earlier and
    had
    hired a private detective to tail them.

    After just standing there, just watching the guests' reactions for a
    couple
    of minutes, he turned to the best man and said, "Fuck you!". Then he
    turned
    to his bride and said,"Fuck you!".

    Then he turned to the dumbfounded crowd and said, "I'm outta here."

    He had the marriage annulled first thing in the morning.

    While most people would have canceled the wedding immediately after
    finding
    out about the affair, this guy goes through with the charade, as if
    nothing
    were wrong.

    His revenge...making the bride's parents pay over $32,000 for a 300 guest
    wedding and reception, and best of all, trashing the bride's and best
    man's
    reputations in front of 300
    friends and family members.


  3. #303

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    One day little johnny comes in from the play ground and write the word "penis" on the board in block letters very small. So the teacher comes in and erases it and looks around the class for a guilty face. So the next day he does it again but bigger and its taking up half of the board. So she erases it and looks around the class for a guilty face and doesnt find one. So finally the third day little johnny writes penis on the board in big block letters covering the whole board. The teachers erases is and says "whats up with this word?" So little Johnny stood up and replied "the more you rub it the bigger it gets"

  4. #304
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    lmao yuki, not really a joke but more of a fact, America is a great country, not hateing or saying better than any other, but its the only one where you can start off poor and black and grow up into white and rich aka MJ...

  5. #305

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    haha, scarface, ur one is sweet, the cockle picker one

  6. #306

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    what did fitty cent tell his granmah' when she knitted him a sweater?


    - G You Knit??

  7. #307
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    HAHAHAHA i woke up and remember that joke ima tell it to my mom when she gets home... from robbing old people
    ................BIA.AOC.MF.666................


    ...RIP WASTER12... Family Forever
    Quote Originally Posted by wasterthehater View Post
    love ya too geebus

  8. #308

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    ya u do that G...
    theres nuttin better to do in Fl then drink orange juice and rob old people.... amen

  9. #309

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    :lol: :lol: orange juice


    NOW THAT is classic comedy

    hehehehehehe :P

  10. #310

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    theres this gay guy who got kicked out of his appartment and so he asks if he can stay the night and have a shower at his straight friends house the guy says only if you dont jerk off in my shower thats just gross the gay guy says ok so the gay guy goes to his friends house has a shower then leaves the straight guy goes to take a shower in the morning and theres cum everywere like on the roof, the curtain, the walls, everywere so the guys really pissed of so he phones the gay guys cell phone and says why did you jerk off in my shower he said i didnt i farted....


    also how do you get a goth out of a tree.....
    cut the rope

    not racist

    wats the difference between a black guy and a bench
    one can support a family

  11. #311

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    This was originaly posted in the fresstyle thread, but I guess it's more of a joke. Even if the guy is my new idol...

    Chek out this kid freestyle...killer rhymes!!
    Freestyle
    WooT Woot!!!
    Urban art canvases, photography, prints... check it out at
    http://www.ace-of-art.com


  12. #312
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    Originally posted by e.pau-hp@Dec 17 2004, 11:41 PM
    This was originaly posted in the fresstyle thread, but I guess it's more of a joke. Even if the guy is my new idol...

    Chek out this kid freestyle...killer rhymes!!
    Freestyle
    WooT Woot!!!
    wow... just fuckin wow.
    QUOTE Joust, will you marry me ?

    QUOTE Joust cant flow' but he still rides on tewntyfo's.


    QUOTE waste 12 is jesus. and even jesus liked KFC biscuits... and was maybe a bit oriental...

    RIP





    QUOTE (TrashCan @ Aug 15 2006, 08:23 PM) is that a horse eating his dick?
    What the fuck else u think they eat??? hay?

  13. #313
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    why do women have shorter feet than men?


    so they can stand closer to the sink

  14. #314

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    Originally posted by Slob@Dec 18 2004, 03:06 AM
    why do women have shorter feet than men?


    so they can stand closer to the sink
    i dont get that

  15. #315
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    ^^^your ignorence shows in your posts....



    " ya u do that G...
    theres nuttin better to do in Fl then drink orange juice and rob old people.... amen "

    :lol:

  16. #316
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    why do all spanish and mexican people drive low riders?

    cuz its easier for them to pick cabbage


    why do black people call white people honkies?

    cuz thats the last thing they hear when they get run over
    *905*


  17. #317

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    Originally posted by mad@Mar 16 2005, 06:56 PM


    why do black people call white people honkies?

    cuz thats the last thing they hear when they get run over
    hahahaha

  18. #318
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    Originally posted by **MATEO**+Mar 16 2005, 03:16 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (**MATEO** @ Mar 16 2005, 03:16 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Slob@Dec 18 2004, 03:06 AM
    why do women have shorter feet than men?


    so they can stand closer to the sink
    i dont get that [/b][/quote]
    because you&#39;re an idiot.


  19. #319

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    one day a snail crawls up to this guys door and as the guy leaves for work he sees the snail and tosses it over his house and he brokes his shell. so 3 years later the snail crawls his way slowly back to the front door and the guys leaving for work and sees the snail and recognizes him and he yells "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM&#33;&#33;"

  20. #320
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    what has 2 legs and bleeds alot.





















    HALF A CAT,,,,,HAHAHAHAHAHA


 

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