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Thread: Jokes...

  1. #101

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    whats worse than his 1 baby nailed to 10 trees?

    the 6 year old in my closet bout to get nailed by me and my 9 buddies

  2. #102
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    i got one

    Whats the diffrence between sand, and menstrile fluid?



    you cant gargle sand

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
    QUOTE Joust, will you marry me ?

    QUOTE Joust cant flow' but he still rides on tewntyfo's.


    QUOTE waste 12 is jesus. and even jesus liked KFC biscuits... and was maybe a bit oriental...

    RIP





    QUOTE (TrashCan @ Aug 15 2006, 08:23 PM) is that a horse eating his dick?
    What the fuck else u think they eat??? hay?

  3. #103
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    how do you make a dead baby float?

    a large glass, rootbear, and a dead baby



    (dead baby as in rootbear)
    *905*


  4. #104

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    Q. whats orange and blue and at the bottom of a swimming pool?
    A. a baby with broken water-wings.

    Q. how many dead babies does it take to paint a house?
    A. depends how hard you throw them.

    lust the rust.

  5. #105

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    Originally posted by afterten@Oct 31 2004, 11:13 AM
    whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree?

    1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.


    thats right, I went there.
    lmfao
    (laughing my fat ass off.)
    <span style=\'font-family:Impact\'><span style=\'font-size:21pt;line-height:100%\'><span style=\'color:yellow\'>MY PENIS IS ONE INCH&#33;</span></span></span>

  6. #106

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    What is the title of the White racist&#39;s favorite how-to-book?
    "How to Steal, Rape and Murder".

    this is my verson
    What is the title of the White racist&#39;s favorite how-to-book?
    "How to Steal, Rape and Murder...oh and how to do graffiti tagging".

  7. #107

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    Im new to this forum thing, but lets give it a go shall we?...

    Q: What do women and a hurricane have in common?

    A: They both come on wet and wild, but when they leave they take your house and your car with them&#33;&#33;&#33;

    P.S.: For all of you that havent seen "Traffic" (where i got the joke) i advise you to see it A.S.A.P.&#33;&#33;&#33;
    <!--QuoteBegin-Jack Black &amp; Kyle Gass+ Tenacious D<span style=\'font-size:14pt;line-height:100%\'><u>10 Commandments of the D</u></span>1. Never stop Rocking.
    2. Legalize all drugs.
    3. Quit your day job.
    4. All Religion should be taxed.
    5. Cut down on carbohydrates.
    6. Fu*k her gently.
    7. Never believe what people tell you after a show.
    8. Always take a spoon full of Metamucil after a heavy day of eating.
    9. Get at least 9 hours of sleep a day.
    10. Eatin&#39; ain&#39;t cheatin&#39;.
    </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    --&#62;P.S.: Randall a.k.a. Randy Blythe (Lamb of God)...
    --&#62;BEST METAL SINGER OF ALL TIME&#33;&#33;&#33;, YEAH WHAT&#33;?&#33;

    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE (Randall a.k.a. Randy Blythe (Lamb of God) &#064; Ashes of the Wake)</td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool, or a coward... Whoever can not take CARE of of himself without that law is both. For a wounded man will say to his assailant, &quot;If I live, I will kill you. If I die, all is forgiven...&quot;. Such is the rule, of honor.</td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>

  8. #108

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    I got another one for y&#39;all...

    Tracy LOVED baked beans, but whenever she ate them the beans seemed to give her a very ill effect. But when the time came that her husband proposed and they would soon be wed, she decided to give up her addiction indefinetly&#33;&#33;&#33;

    On her way home from work her car broke down and imagin the irony that she didnt have her cell-phone with her at the time so she decided to walk to the nearest town to use the pay-phone...

    Upon her entry into town she recognized a sweet scent comming from the diner just across the street. As she strolled into the diner she asked the clerk, "Excuse me, what is that ever so lovely smell?", the clerk answered, "Were having a special on baked beans this evening. Would you like to have a bowl?". Tracy knew the conciquences of her eating the baked beans but she decided that she was far enough from home that she could calm the ill effect before she got there...

    By the time she was done, she had polished off about 3 bowls of baked beans. After she decided that it was time to go and she putt-putted herself all the way home (no relation to the little piggy that went "wee-wee-wee all the way home"...

    As she entered the house her husband quickly blindfolded her and strolled her into the dining room where he sat her down at the head of the table. Suddenly the phone rang and he quickly ran into the other room to answer it, before he left he sternly told her to stay put...

    By this time the pressure of the beans became unbearable, so she gently eased her weight to one side and let loose the most irrefudable, rotten eggs, sulfer mine, fart possible...

    By the time her husband arrived she had fanned the stench away and she was the ideal form of innocence...

    When her husband removed the blindfold, much to her horror sat her family and newly found in-laws&#33;&#33;&#33;
    <!--QuoteBegin-Jack Black &amp; Kyle Gass+ Tenacious D<span style=\'font-size:14pt;line-height:100%\'><u>10 Commandments of the D</u></span>1. Never stop Rocking.
    2. Legalize all drugs.
    3. Quit your day job.
    4. All Religion should be taxed.
    5. Cut down on carbohydrates.
    6. Fu*k her gently.
    7. Never believe what people tell you after a show.
    8. Always take a spoon full of Metamucil after a heavy day of eating.
    9. Get at least 9 hours of sleep a day.
    10. Eatin&#39; ain&#39;t cheatin&#39;.
    </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    --&#62;P.S.: Randall a.k.a. Randy Blythe (Lamb of God)...
    --&#62;BEST METAL SINGER OF ALL TIME&#33;&#33;&#33;, YEAH WHAT&#33;?&#33;

    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE (Randall a.k.a. Randy Blythe (Lamb of God) &#064; Ashes of the Wake)</td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool, or a coward... Whoever can not take CARE of of himself without that law is both. For a wounded man will say to his assailant, &quot;If I live, I will kill you. If I die, all is forgiven...&quot;. Such is the rule, of honor.</td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>

  9. #109

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    Q: When is it Michael Jackson&#39;s bedtime ?
    A: When the big hand touches the little hand



  10. #110
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    these last few jokes (accept the last one from rik) were TERRABLE.


  11. #111

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    what does PONTIAC stand for?
    Poor Old ******s Thinking Its A Cadillac.
    Scafe, The One N&#39; Only.

  12. #112
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    stolen off ebaums


    Two male buddies were walking through the woods when out of no where, a poisonous snake came and bit one of the men in the penis&#33; The man collapsed to the ground while his friend ran to town to get help. The man arrived at a doctor&#39;s office and said help, help, my friend was bit by a snake in the penis. The doctor remarked that he couldn&#39;t get all his tools to the woods in time to save the friend, so he told him that he would have to suck the venom out of his friend&#33; There has got to be another way said the man and the doctor sighed no I am sorry&#33; The man ran back to the woods and found his poor friends lying on the floor in allot of pain&#33; The man on the floor cried, what did the doctor say? The friend said, he said you&#39;re going to die.


    A man&#39;s wife asks him to go to the store to buy some cigarettes. So he walks down to the store only to find it closed. So he goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine. At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers and one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment.

    After they&#39;ve had their fun, he realizes its 3AM and says, "Oh no, its so late, my wife&#39;s going to kill me.
    Have you got any talcum powder?" She gives him some talcum powder, which he proceeds to rub on his hands and then he goes home. His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and she is pretty pissed.

    "Where the hell have you been?&#33;"
    "Well, honey, it&#39;s like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking chick there and we had a few drinks and one thing led to another and I ended up in bed with her."
    "Oh yeah? Let me see your hands&#33;"

    She sees his hands are covered with powder and... "You God damn liar&#33;&#33; You went bowling again&#33;&#33;"


  13. #113

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    Tony the tiger and his art is the biggest joke ive ever seen&#33;&#33;

  14. #114

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    Originally posted by BiggestToy@Nov 1 2004, 03:43 PM
    Tony the tiger and his art is the biggest joke ive ever seen&#33;&#33;
    and yr the stupidist mother fucka ive evea herd of tell a joke or fuck off
    &quot;heresy grows from idleness&quot;
    i wake up every morning and ask: what does god have instore for me today...?
    nz forum
    -dfa-crew-represent-

  15. #115
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    ave it ^^


    site-photography.co .uk

    Please Visit^^


  16. #116

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    why did the tree go to wisconsin?





















    CAUSE HE HAD TO LEAF&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;& #33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;& #33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;& #33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;& #33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;& #33;

    HAHAHAH IM SO FUNNNY I HTINK IM SO HARD LAUGHING ITS RIDICULOUS HAHAHTREE LEAF GET IT BAH+FHAFHADFOSDFSOGXLCVXBVODFOIgjLDSNGLFDNVXNCVOUI SNDUIOFsdIGNDBKJNcbknclxzbnoiPFGDFOGPJ DFOIGFD









    SYSTEM SHUT DOWN

    wow, i just came back to bombingscience.com like a year ever since i made this and put this on bs, and i thank god that ive gotten better.

  17. #117

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    WTF :huh:
    &quot;heresy grows from idleness&quot;
    i wake up every morning and ask: what does god have instore for me today...?
    nz forum
    -dfa-crew-represent-

  18. #118

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    i already shared that PONTIAC joke Scaf.


    What did the blind man say to the blind lady?

    Hey long time no see

    B)

    Oh yes, nothin better then some good ol blind jokes to top off a good evening

    OH Almost forgot, the BIGGEST joke of all&#33;

    George W Bush re-elected in 2004&#33;

    Animal Fuckin Model Bitches Till I Leave Their Stick Figure Anorexic Pussy In Stitches

  19. #119
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    I MUST try this. Go up to a person with one or no arms and just start clapping.

    So cruel.


  20. #120

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    loll you sick bastard i love ya :lol:

    or go to a blind man and ask em for the time
    or go to a def guy and ask if he heard who won the football game
    or go to a guy with a deformed hand and say
    &#39;&#39;buddy, need a hand&#39;&#39;


    :lol:

    HELL HERE I COME

    Animal Fuckin Model Bitches Till I Leave Their Stick Figure Anorexic Pussy In Stitches


 

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