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Thread: Drunken Stories

  1. #61
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    Originally posted by NeO.Skunkkr1@Mar 2 2005, 04:44 PM
    some of you need to figure out what an actual alcoholic is...
    my mom was an alcoholic every sence shes was 16 and she drank till she lost her memory at age 45. thats a fuckin alcoholic.

    so dont sit there and tell me that bullshit, motherfucker.


    :lol: good day

  2. #62
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    ahah....

    my aunts an alcoholic.. .well was...

    now she ends up i nthe hospital after a beer or two... spent 2 yrs in detox... she cant drink nemore or she passes out haha
    <span style=\'color:skyblue\'>
    [<span style=\'colorrange\'>CLICK CLICK ME&#33;&#33;</span>]
    ------514 reprezent&#33;------
    [C]reating [A]rtistik [C]haos
    </span></div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE (mr. she77)</td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>waste will you be my best friend?</td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE (msfyt)</td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>&quot;the last thing you need is more attention&quot;
    *closed* </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>

  3. #63
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    my name is ol dirty basterd, and ima alcaholic....*gag* haha, yeah me to nigaaa, whoooooowhhaaaoooooooooo....

    ^tru gangsters know that song...

  4. #64
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    Does anyone ever black out while drunkand do stupid shit? One time I was drinking with a group of friends, there was 5 of us drinking and 36 Coronas and two pints of E&J with like 4 dimes of dro, and somewhere after knocking over the Christmas tree, falling to the floor and hitting my head I blacked out.
    Now this is from what I was told:
    Some time after that I went to the bathroom after going on and on about fire and asking for a lighter. Knowing this my cousin was trying to keep track of how long I was in there, but after 3 minutes water was seen running from under the door. They opened the locked door to find me, legs hanging out of the bathtub, throwing up with the sink cabinet broken from the floor moved a foot to the right. After turning on the water, spraying me, I began getting belligerant and some how got onto the subject of how I at the time loved Tina then proceeded to yell the news through out the house (mind you the times 1 Am Sunday morning at my cousins house). At about 2 the bitches left and I started yelling to my cousin that we should go walking around looking for bitches when his mom woke up and scared the shit out of me and I supposedly looked as if I were about to cry but my aunt likes to over exaggerate.

    Anyway thats one of my intoxicated tales.


    <span style=\'font-size:21pt;line-height:100%\'><span style=\'color:yellow\'>Its funny how people will sit there and say their citys better than another city and haven&#39;t even been to CHICAGO, not that if you had you&#39;d admit that your city sucks in compairison, but then at least you&#39;d know.</span></span>
    <span style=\'color:green\'>EXCUSES EXCUSES</span>
    &quot;I wanna be a buffer so I can get paid for lining you toys...&quot;

  5. #65

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    ahah....

    my aunts an alcoholic.. .well was...
    oh shit... big time Snap. so was myne.


    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>meatgrinder &amp; cherubic meekus 4 lyfe </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    Vegimite on Toast
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>meekus 4 lyfe </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    Gesus
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>and we shall have an emo holocauhst [sic], headed by adolf meekus. only hes got two balls and wont shoot himself </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    sketch3

    (THE VAINGLORIOUS SIGNATURE)

  6. #66

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    some of you need to figure out what an actual alcoholic is...
    obviously your going to put us in our place now...
    so go on little one... you tell us what a little alchoholic is.


    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>meatgrinder &amp; cherubic meekus 4 lyfe </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    Vegimite on Toast
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>meekus 4 lyfe </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    Gesus
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>and we shall have an emo holocauhst [sic], headed by adolf meekus. only hes got two balls and wont shoot himself </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    sketch3

    (THE VAINGLORIOUS SIGNATURE)

  7. #67

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    well my homie got really drunk and high and was
    like fuck ya&#39;ll im goin home&#33; and tried walkin back to florida from chicago..... lol


  8. #68
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    ]finished off bottles.[/URL]

    took about a month by myself to finish all that off. all my friends have me go get them thier own bottles so we just all drink and paint.

  9. #69

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    i was so drunk once i let this girl pee all over my chest then
    ate here out..


    not sooo proud of that moment..
    =====================================
    this post was brought to you by XYLENE HUG
    in assosiation with CAT CULT.
    =====================================

    Quote Originally Posted by Ume View Post
    Holy Asian! Most Asian I've ever Asianed in Asia!

  10. #70

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    i kan honestly say ive never been drunk on nething exsept mabey power lol i drink for the flavor not the effekt. but w/e i get high alot though
    newayz, i was hangin wit some of my friends over on the E/S onse and were were all just drinkin and smokin and i swear to god we ate Every last thang in that house that was edible. then we went, stole a van and went joy ridin. and when we ditkhed it and went bakk to his house, his mom was w8in for us and said we had to pay her so she wouldnt tell our parents (shes a bitkh) idk what happened kause i fell asleep early, but my homeboy kartoon woke up in the kloset, not in the bottom either, but up in the top kurled up on a shelf

  11. #71

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    hahah thats dope. ive woken up in so many places....

    ex. curled up next to my friends german shepard...hahah. :lol:
    That's why AA is my fuckin American Idol
    witty comments like this makes this guy a star
    ^Whoa

    heh, it's funny cuz his name is alcoholics anonymous, and we're speaking as if it was a...

    oh hell, you all know why it's funny
    ^FoeOne

    haha

    yo you gotta problem today, hit up AA, he got more shit then a pharm-ma-say

    sucka ass fools!

    whut whut

    yo theme song
    ^Gesus

    did you seriously just spell lion with an e
    ^E Terror sonnn

  12. #72

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    my friend told me a story that these 2 kids got so drunk they started making out and one gave the other one a hand duke or something


  13. #73

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    this is a fresh one from tonight, after skoo i went over to my friends smoked a couple bleezies, went to my gurls house drank a bottle of dry din, after this i was already perkin drank a 40 of some 211, then my gurl was walkin me home and we stopd on this corner and she tried start fuckin on this fuckn corner, so i took her to this park and i ended up beeatn those on this fucken wet table top. hahahaha now im just rollin up another blunt to my dome and still perkin&#33; Ha

  14. #74

    Default

    [QUOTE]
    these 2 kids got so drunk they started making out and one gave the other one a hand duke or something

    YO&#33;
    That same shit happened in my town too. A bunch of people seen it, they said that
    it just happened out of the blue. It was gross but eve&#39;body just started laughing.

    Once, in high school, we peed in this dudes forty when he wasn&#39;t looking.
    Then he decided to chug, like a real MAN, in front of all the girls. I still remember
    the look on his face when he got about halfway through. He wasn&#39;t very popular
    and this was his big moment, everybody was chanting CHUG CHUG, but he knew he was drinking pee. He closed his eyes and drank it all....
    I could almost puke just thinking of it.

    yahahahoo&#33;

  15. #75

    Default

    ^eww id spit it all out over the crowd of people, like a heavy metal band would (except with blood :lol: )
    That's why AA is my fuckin American Idol
    witty comments like this makes this guy a star
    ^Whoa

    heh, it's funny cuz his name is alcoholics anonymous, and we're speaking as if it was a...

    oh hell, you all know why it's funny
    ^FoeOne

    haha

    yo you gotta problem today, hit up AA, he got more shit then a pharm-ma-say

    sucka ass fools!

    whut whut

    yo theme song
    ^Gesus

    did you seriously just spell lion with an e
    ^E Terror sonnn

  16. #76

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    I&#39;m drinking a 473ml of POM.





    Pomagranate Juice for all you newbies to the drinking world.
    When I die, burry me deep, so I can hear old 29, as she goes rollin&#39; by

  17. #77

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    damn you people dont know how to drink :P
    you should never mix drinks or else you end up vomiting
    and shit which is not so cool.

    stick with one drink and youll have a good time B)

  18. #78
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    Mixing alcohol only happens to other people. Go straight (even if you aren&#39;t), you don&#39;t wanna have to wash your puke off your buddies sofa.

    I&#39;ll pepper this lame post with an anecdote.

    Me and a friend were walking away from the depanneur with 4 king cans, when we met up with these other dudes who were arguing with what appeared to be a typical, lonely suburbian maniac who fucked up his life. Dude&#39;s like &#39;&#39;this is my neighborhood. You guys wanna drink beer, you gotta ask me first. And if by tomorrow that grafitti isn&#39;t gone, i&#39;m gonna find you.&#39;&#39; Were like who the fuck is this dude anyway? We start walking away. Fucker starts following, talking about how we gotta check in if we wanna drink our lives away. After like 15 minutes my friends like &#39;I&#39;m gonna turn around and smash this motherfucker&#39;&#39;. &#39;&#39;Just wait, he&#39;ll leave.&#39;&#39; Well he did leave, but he came back like ten minutes later and had this beat up cellphone, saying how he was gonna call the cops if we didn&#39;t check in. &#39;&#39;Go ahead, muffin. We&#39;ll be right here.&#39;&#39; So he starts dialing really slowly and goes for about 20 digits then my friend says &#39;&#39;Get the fuck out of here or we&#39;ll beat your ass.&#39;&#39; He drops his cell, walks up to us real Eastwood style and says &#39;&#39;You gotta know the law, if you gon&#39; break it.&#39;&#39; He pushes my friend once then recieved two punches simultaneously to the right and left sides of his head. We layed him down in a corner and wrote a message on his shirt. &#39;&#39;Need food, sex and the occasional ass-whipping. Does not bite.&#39;&#39; The guy was mumbling so we poured the rest of a can on his head then left.

    Good times.

  19. #79

    Default

    ive just been consuming pimms by the gulp-ful....
    lat night I tried to circumcise my self but was restrained.I also flame throwed my mate tom jenkins with deodrants and a lighter....
    It all went horribly wrong.
    He has no eyebrows and a broken collar bone.


    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>meatgrinder &amp; cherubic meekus 4 lyfe </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    Vegimite on Toast
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>meekus 4 lyfe </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    Gesus
    </div><table border=\'0\' align=\'center\' width=\'95%\' cellpadding=\'3\' cellspacing=\'1\'><tr><td>QUOTE </td></tr><tr><td id=\'QUOTE\'>and we shall have an emo holocauhst [sic], headed by adolf meekus. only hes got two balls and wont shoot himself </td></tr></table><div class=\'signature\'>
    sketch3

    (THE VAINGLORIOUS SIGNATURE)

  20. #80

    Default

    Originally posted by Cherubic Meekus@Nov 7 2004, 03:03 PM
    I sucked a guys dick why under the influence of alchohol......

    Only kidding my fleeceable audience.
    We used to train surf and go out mugging after drinking almost 3 litres of White Lightning
    i dont know if they got a different kinda white lightning where youre from...but 3 liters of moonshine and your ass would be dead. done. end of story.


    i used to go mug guatemalans downtown when they stumble outta bars on saterday nights durring the summer. thats pay-day in the landscaping community. always cash and always in their shoes. they are so short its kinda like robbing kidds.


 

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