just a quick whatever pencil sketch
the bars in your S are too skinny.
KnoxIn: That style looks a little over your head right now. Throw down some simps and you'll get better crits that will help you progress a style (possibly similar to that one).
Safe: You've got quite a few unnecessary extensions that make that look kinda sloppy. Also, your S and A look to be quite a bit more developed than the F and E. I'm not particularly fond of any of them, but the S and A are definitely better in comparison to the F and E.
Rayz: Lookin' pretty fresh man. I can't put my finger on it, but there's something about the structure of that Y that I don't like. Maybe it's just how all of the bars squish inward towards the center that I don't like. If there's a letter there you should play around with, it's the Y, in my opinion.
Just some simps I've done lately out of boredom:
knoxin- somethings not right, i mean its a better 3D than i can do but your letters lack originality and flava, and there is a lot of dead/empty space that you should get rid off by bending your bars differently/making them fatter/ or adding some extensions like the add on on the I.
safe-theres a lot of little things wrong bot if you fix them i think youll be fine. lemme give you letter by letter crits to make it easier. (sry if its a lot just read it quickly and anything that sticks use it)
S-its skinny all the bars on your s are smaller than the rest, i always have that problem when i sketch that my bars get progressively bigger, easiest way to fix it is once you finish your sketch go over all the letters again backwards from last to first to smooth it out. it takes longer but its worth it.
A- not much wrong, i think yo should lose the extension on the bottom right or straighten it out because it bends and the rest of the letters are straight(er), also the bottom right extension breaks up your flow because it goes up on a diagonal to the right on the same height as the middle bar on your A, this contrasts too much with the structure of your A. later on it could work when youre doing more complicated stuff, because you can fix this by adding other extensions but im not gonna go into that now.
F- probably the worst letter in the piece. the upright bar is too fat, the connection on the top left shouldnt be there, the F is shorter than your E and if you check any font F's and E's are usually the same length, and for simples should at least be close. its also the only letter that bends making it look rly out of place. and the middle/bottom horizontal bar is much too short. (for starters)
E- the E is fine rly, the bottom left extension is skinnier than your others bars so fatten it up, or loose it al together. lose the extension on the top, it doesnt flow, it looks awkward. and unbend the bottom right extension. also raise the E so that its on the same 'level' as the A so make the piece kind of have a V flow whichll make it look smoother.
sorry i talked so much but i feel that you have potential and could go far, so i had to give my 2 cents.
rays- not a fan of euro styles, id say dont overlap the bottom bars of the A, but then again euros not y thing so idk.
sketch for an exchange with KANSER/KANSR. i did this and then got a lazy attack so i didnt ink it, ill probs end up doing that tomorrow or the day after... well see.
i know its kinda hard to see, might get a better pic later.
edit: sry bsquared wrote all that before you posted. lol. all i gotta say is fatten up the top sketch, the bottom ones fine.
Last edited by skeetz; 08-17-2009 at 10:17 PM.
All I've got to say is...
GIVE CRITS TO GET CRITS!
i think in the first one your A looks real stiff compared to the other letters. and in the 2nd one your A kinda flows in a different direction from the others.
Last edited by nuce4; 08-18-2009 at 01:25 PM.
i suck at coloring. please crit the structure. and i decided to change what i wrote, this is a possibility, so if theres some untouchable graffiti god that uses this, please let me know. thanks
edit:this is not something i took my time on, i can see that my structure is fucked up, just looking for opinions.
kanser ink it and repost, its hard to see shit
stussy looks well developed, but whoever was saying your "Y" is the problem was right, try bending it some.
yamie the bottom bar on your "I" is too fat. and not the good kind like a latina chick's ass.
Yo crits guys working good this page very nice stuff
DEVO AND KAYZ
stussys name is rays not kays....
edit: it also looks to me like your trying to copy this style too much, and in my opinion its been overdone, so unless youve rocked that style for a few years now (like viper below) i'd say start over.
Last edited by skeetz; 08-18-2009 at 05:29 PM.