literally 5mins ago i was trying to blaze a bong sesh (Shotties/Poppers) if u dun no what that is then u are lame lol.. anyways... a fucking spider landed on my hand and crawled down to the lighter as i was lighting it.. and i FUCKING JUMPED like WHOA and i literally torched the spider to fuck all which is why i jumped like WHOA cuz it went up in a decent sized flame.. and i lost my weed in the process of jumping up lolol... pathetic fucking spiders i know . and yes i hate spiders more then anything. other then olives.
I work at a college as a janitor even though I feel like I'm smarter than most of the people who go there. Sometimes I see an equation written on a blackboard like half an equation and... I just figure it out.
i was on plane once and i was sitting there captain gets on does his whole we'll be cruising 5 thousand feet but then he puts the mic down he forgets to turn it off and so he turns to the co pilot and is like you know "all i could use right now is a fucking blowjob and a cup of coffee" so the stuartist comes bombing up from the back of the plane to tell him the microphone is still on and this guy in the back of the plane is like "hey hun don't forget the coffee!"