an its gonna be along december, and theres reason to belive that maybe this year will be better then the last.... sigh... so so close... yet so far away, these are the shitty times the times where out last convos happen, i remember fucking breaking down downtown with everyone once this shit happened like it was yesterday, i remember some guy i didnt know relling me everything gonna eventually be allright then walking off... maybe hes right but doesnt seem like it... "when im gone an outta site homie down worry about me ill be alright" le sigh....gotdamn i miss you kid, god damn i miss you....
Really wish i could knew the kat. Guys stylin was so iLL is was ridiculous. If i had permission and the skill i would want to commemorate a piece even a sketch. But neither has came =[
if you could go higher he always did! MISS YOU 12....! wish i had kept the blank canvas he neva started for me...and gesus eventually it will b alright..yur random is right
he just a fag who likes fucking with the mods you might know him as 81.106.33.118 : cpc4-oldh5-0-0-cust373.manc.cable.ntl.com Post IP Addresses Big Mick 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Cror's Tiny Penis 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Daddy Kool 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Macca 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Macca987 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Registration IP Addresses Big Mick 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Cror's Tiny Penis 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Daddy Kool 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Macca 81.106.33.118 [Find Posts by User] [View Other IP Addresses for this User] Macca987 81.106.33.118 theres his IP is anyone wants it... anyways his posts were deleated, him bring beef to this thread was just another way for someone to notice him, its sad that people are so starved for attechion that they must infact disrespect a dead person to have someone pay attechion to there voice on the internet... fucking pathetic
I was about to say the same thing...he would all ways go higher than everyone.... do a sketch mate.... waste would never of downed you for it....
sorry gesus didnt mean to fuel his fire but yeah if i knew how to find him id beat his ass not personally kniwing waste doesnt mewan i or anyone else aint got the right to beat a hater .rip waster 12 ... the ilovewastertwelve throiwe was
tony, for real, chill with these dreams...... I guess my subconcious is tweeked and overpowers me. I woke up screaming again, my pillow soaked with memory. I keep having the same exact dream, i won't go into detail, it's severly morbid...but it plays in flashframe...really fast scenes and then really slowed down ones. Lain is on, and he is there...He is alive and vibrate....then his glow is replaced with a photograph from his dad i recieved, that cannot be erased. Yo, i'm shook. 4 stallions, not mares have invaded my nights... Why can't I find the place to let him rest????????? I KNOW that if I could release this back into the universe my soul could heal from my own personal loss of Antonio...... Seemingly impossible. The strangest part of it all is... My life is rockin' I am the happiest I have ever been... Married my best friend, I got Tony's blessing before AND after he passed... He knew him from this website and def approved of our connection, so why then are my dreams still wrapped around a twelve??? It's hard you know, to get woken up from dreams like these and him know they are still about Tony.... It's a akward feeling that I am stuck with.... incomplete this and thats.... [FONT=Arial, Helvetica]Some days awakenings move as slowly as your funeral procession. The nights stand still. Or shake me to the core... Wiping sleep and tears from my eyes... Empty vessels are but decoration and some days like this day I'm empty without your words. Your voice filled my life with hope, your love and compassion gave so many details meaning. Little remains in all reality but a forgotten plot with a stone that reads rest in peace. But there is no rest, and peace is not finding me where i sleep. I never thought I'd see the day When I would find you'd slipped away A artist sickness that had left you numb Your body could not overcome You were my grandshun and my friend From the start to painful end Even now, I cannot describe The emptiness I feel inside Without you my lifes not the same I feel I have myself to blame Because the day that you did die I didn't get to say goodbye I called and left a message twice we all did, we wondered why Your birthday is coming up... a year later, my minds fucked up. I haven't been on BS in months... I wait for a response from him, something in my inbox... today, a thursday, no particular reasoning... I awoke covered in tears, Went in the closet and brought down a box, filled with all his art and intention even now I still can't mention how much this man has touched and forever changed this bug I'd do anything, ANYTHING for next time you come thru my slumber just lay with me and hug. I need a convo with pills... i miss so many of you bombing science crew... ramble ramble my thoughts get typed just didn't know where to put this yet again i am here feeling lost. I miss Antonio beyond any words I can type off the top of my head... Some days the air is just thicker than others and i can't find my breath exhale on bombing science afterall this was the beginning to a ever after union and i can't hold it in. depressed? nah nah i am not that...I have a smile on as I looked through the photographs and all the sketches past... He really is buried in my heart and from time to time he digs.... deeper, to the places I can't help but deal and rewind.... My dreams are held captive and if you hear me, come nearer to me, Turn off the dramatic soundtrack and hum to me once more... bring back the purple sunsets and cotton candy clouds... Are any of you with me here? Are your dreams the peace you can't find? Above all, I am wonderful, content and EXACTLY where he would want me to be in my life...so why am i replaying a vision, I didn't even see with my own eyes...perhaps he is standing behind me... watching as i type.... read this mistah 12 and draw me R.E.M stage lullabys... I can't write anymore......my head is numb. I just needed a place to put this...rip antonio. [/FONT]
The other day I was at a thrift shop looking at books, and without thinking started to pick out books for Tony. I remembered that he was dead and had to sit down, out of breath, crying. Even though I saw him dead, at times, I forget.
" and if you should cry, dont blame ya self or keep it locked inside" i forget the name of the song, i know its on the FREK SHOW album, ilove twiztid!! rip waster12...
bump that... View attachment 323793 View attachment 323794 and some for the queenbee... [Broken External Image]:http://img469.imageshack.us/img469/7039/00000010001ha1.jpg and one for the doctor...
it has been 1 year and it still feel like it was yesterday that you said ''later man'' while leaving. i just cant shake out the feeling that you just might appear again, just as randomly as you used to do. so once again, later man, and thanks for the 6 years of fun times and memories. rest in peace.