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Drunken Stories

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Cherubic Meekus, Nov 7, 2004.

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  1. FailOne

    FailOne Senior Member

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    This one time i was at my hommies place gettin tanked
    I had no smokes n ya know how it is if your a smoker n your drinkin
    so my hommie was like, ill give you 5 smokes if you can stick this lighter up your nose, turns out i have pretty big nostrils n it worked, i got 5 smokes
    n now i trip people out when were all high n shit by stickin a lighter up my nose.
     
  2. WoeInfinite

    WoeInfinite Elite Member

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    damn dude, like the whole thing?
    or just the end of it?
    my homie sticks quarters up his noze and got them stuck once hahahah
     
  3. YourSistersMooseKnuckle

    YourSistersMooseKnuckle Senior Member

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    I was on Fairfax Blvd with my brother.
    We drank a gang of pints and decided to get a pizza and more beers at Mr. pizza.
    After we ate pretty much all the pizza we decided to take the photos off the walls out of the frames and fill my back pack with beers.
    Then my brother got sick on the tabel next to us. mind you the place was fucking packed. the waiter came over and asked what was wrong.
    I told him the pizza made him sick.
    The waiter said some salty shit and we said we werent paying for anything and decided to leave.
    The waiter and the bus boy followed us down the street talking yack.
    As soon as we turned the corned I told my brother "watch this"
    as soon as the waiter stuck his head around the corner I socked that fool in the mouth proper.
    He fell down to the pavement and his busboy counter part started throwing round house kicks and shit.
    My brother ran up on him and open field tackled him.
    I proceeded to stomp that fool out and we promptly fled the scene.
    stumbling. The whole time I had the beers in my bag.
    I woke up on my floor with one shoe on and my brother slept in the tub.
    It was crazy...and fun.
    anyways thought id share.
     
  4. PeeInTheShower

    PeeInTheShower Elite Member

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    drank three oe's in about an hour and a half or so, fucking shitfaced. so i call up this girl that i was talking to at the time, not really that close to her, so i figured, i'm drunk as fuck so i'll break the tension. we start talking about bullshit, i'm cuttin' up and actin' like any drunken idiot would. i go to light a cigarette and BAM fall back in my garage and hit my head on one of the shelves. i'm in a daze, and i remember hearing "this isn't fucking funny, i'm not laughing, you're an asshole" blah blah blah. i'm thinkin', how the fuck am i an asshole? i just passed out.. she gets on her phone right away, and no more than two minutes later ambulance show up, they start approaching me, i snap out of it, i'm thinkin whoa whoa whoa chill out i'm straight. the emt asked how much i had to drink, i said about 3 32oz bottle's of OE. they get back in the truck and they're like "god damn, save up some money for some real beer". yeah, i never saw that bitch again after that.
     
  5. dceeserkills

    dceeserkills Senior Member

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    ^lmao

    OE's are str8 as fuck tho i drink them all the time

    i guess is cus im a broke bastard
     
  6. triple6inthemix

    triple6inthemix Senior Member

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    hahahahaha ftw
     
  7. B.S. POLICE

    B.S. POLICE Banned

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    lol your lucky you didnt lift your head up right before an overpass
     
  8. CRAZDGRAFKINGZ

    CRAZDGRAFKINGZ Member

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    AAIZIGHT
    dis 1 time I was sippen un cisko n shit an I aight diz bitchez lungs
    straight up
    copz got all up my shit but I was liiike naaaaaah
    it was a hooker so they just gave me rad high fives
     
  9. PeeInTheShower

    PeeInTheShower Elite Member

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    excuse me sir, do you have aids?
     
  10. COBALT

    COBALT Elite Member

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    got drunk and fucked my girls best friend well my girl was passed out
    I was really really really drunk
     
  11. dceeserkills

    dceeserkills Senior Member

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  12. COBALT

    COBALT Elite Member

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    ai41.tinypic.com_2njltv8.jpg
    my girl on left her friend on right
     
  13. blaje

    blaje Senior Member

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    So me and my dudes go camping all the time with a lot of people and we were fucking around with our normal campsite and we realized we needed a pong table so later that night we smoke a 20 and drink some colt 45's.
    and around 4 or 5 we found this rich neighborhood and get out of the van. we're all creeping around in backyards and shit, then about an hour later we find a big ass patio table so we drag it up to the street and come back with the van.
    by this point the suns starting to come up and we take it back to the camp site and just pass out there
     
  14. iJiZzCoLoUrS

    iJiZzCoLoUrS Senior Member

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    highfive dude!

    p.s. never saw someone take a picture while on the Zipper, i was too busy trying to spin the thing fast enough to make my passenger vomit

    i <3 vomit
     
  15. iJiZzCoLoUrS

    iJiZzCoLoUrS Senior Member

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    oh my drunk story is:

    so im a klepto and beer + xanax equals me turning into billy the kid.. so im at a party and this chicks purse is sitting open with cash sticking out.. i was like "this is too good to be true" so i snatched it real quick and then two secs later her boyfriend grabbed my shoulder and she comes runnning up and decks me in the face screaming "we were watching you the whole time!!"

    so im like "this bitch just punched me in the face over ten dollars" so i did a bruce lee on her boyfriend and bowed him in the jaw, then slapped the fuck out of the bitch

    *memory loss at this point*

    i woke up in the street with my pockets inside out and my new era gone.. plus my ride left me :(
     
  16. C H E N Z O

    C H E N Z O Elite Member

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    get it up ye .. shoodnt have hit the burd.


    last night .. was mad wi it ... fuckin burned ma thumb sumin awful...

    was sittin up at the bar waitin to b sereved n started meltin a straw in one of the mad wee candles .. a went to drop it in as it was nearly all melted n a somehow managed tae fuckin flick this molten hot black plastic onto ma thumb.


    fuckin agony man. all blistered to fuck now and yellow. no feelin it. found it funny at the time tho cos a was steamin.

    fuckin ragin man.
     
  17. BARFIGHT ARMY

    BARFIGHT ARMY Member

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    Ive got too many drunken escapades, heres a good one.. Me and my boy go out painting, we get to this spot and i thought he was hitting a rooftop now im all sortsa wasted anyways i climb onto the roof to discover theres nothing up there to paint at all so im like wtf? I call me boy to find out hes somewhere completely different, i go to get off the roof fell about 10 ft hit a dumpster rolled off that and hit the ground, get up like nothing happend then decide to run thru a pricker bush onto the highway, realize im on the highway was like "oh shit" run back thru the prickerbush and my boy was like yo im just gonna bring u home im like ok so then i wanted a 711 slurpee so we go there i go to open the door which someone already opened for me and fall face first into the store then i couldnt remember my pin# so we left my boy drops me off at the top of my block and i grabbed my can of krylon and did a fuckin throw E2E on this bldg musta been 60 ft long crazy night
     
    Last edited: May 8, 2009
  18. /DaNk\

    /DaNk\ Member

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    so the first time i got totally wasted, me and my friend drank a whole bottle of this strawberry red wine shit to ourself and when it got really late we decided to pass out... but i forgot it was a school night and that i had to be home, so about 30 mins later i wake up to the door fucking pounding so i get up to go tell my home boy on the couch and when i nealt down to wake him up, i noticed he was totally fucking coverd with puke, that shit was so fucking nasty.. he had the shit like all over his face and shirt, and as im noticing that i hear my dad screaming for me to open the door and shit... so being totaly trashed i trip out and run upstairs to hide and as i get upstairs, my homie opened the door and started bitchin my dad out, and as their yellin at eachother he tries to slap my dad, and my dad just moved like an inch to left and ma homie just went to the ground.... so im like fuck this and i start leavin with my dad, and right as im igorning my dads bitching the fucker threw a jab and fucking decked my ass, i flew to the ground hit my head again and woke up about 5 mins later watching my dad strolling down the street to my house...... shit was fucked up i woke up the next morning with my head feeling like 3 sizes bigger
     
  19. Halo G.E.D

    Halo G.E.D Member

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    1 day got wasted any started tagging in a store lol!
     
  20. Animal

    Animal Senior Member

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    Wow this thread.