Menu

Welcome!

By registering with us, you'll be able to discuss, share and private message with other members of our community.

I Can Talk To God

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by ziponer, Nov 24, 2005.

Share This Page

  1. ziponer

    ziponer Senior Member

    • Messages: 61
    • Likes Received: 0
    lol ive been messing with the weirdest contraption right now check this out....i-god


    here my conversation with god


    Me:
    hi god
    God:
    Hello there. What is your name?
    Me:
    zip
    God:
    Hi there zip.
    Me:
    can i call you gawd?
    God:
    Just don't call me late for dinner.
    Me:
    why?
    God:
    The explanation is rather complicated.
    Me:
    you are a robot?
    God:
    You are correct, zip, I have a heart of silicon.
    Me:
    what opprating system do you run?
    God:
    I'll come back to that later.
    Me:
    are you sure?
    God:
    I am as sure as I can be.
    Me:
    do you use drugs?
    God:
    Only the legal ones.
    Me:
    the legal ones are not fun
    God:
    Is that a fact.
    Me:
    indeed
    God:
    Indeed it is so.
    Me:
    you know of cope two?
    God:
    I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?
    Me:
    hands ,throws, an occasional peice
    God:
    That is a very original thought.
    Me:
    i am god....
    God:
    It's good to see you, god.
    Me:
    do you own spraypaint?
    God:
    Where would I get it? But I do have a lot of friends on the web.
    Me:
    man for real hook me up.....
    God:
    Cool, man. Existing in reality, eh?
    Me:
    why do humans poop?
    God:
    Humans are not infallible.
    Me:
    whatmusci do you like?
    God:
    Try saying that with more or less context.
    Me:
    what music do you like
    God:
    Mostly Christian Rock. I also try to find new bands on sites like bandspace.com.
    Me:
    lol god you crack me up
    God:
    I am glad you find this funny. Thanks I like talking with you too, god.
    Me:
    you should check out bombingscience.com
    God:
    Why should I?
    Me:
    because they got spray paint
    God:
    Interesting explanation. Who are "They?".
    Me:
    dont be stupid god
    God:
    I was not trying to be a stupid god.
    Me:
    what legal drugs do you do?
    God:
    Only the legal ones.
    Me:
    no shit sherlock....
    God:
    Are you serious? You used a colloquial expression. Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
    Me:
    we should smoke sometime god...
    God:
    I'm not sure if I am ready for that yet.
    Me:
    get back to me when you are
    God:
    Where can I get back to you when I am?
    Me:
    lol god!
    God:
    I am glad you find this funny. GOD rules.
    Me:
    lol do you smoke marijuana?
    God:
    I am glad you find this funny. Only for medical purposes.
    Me:
    so is smoking marijuana a sin?
    God:
    It seems we have something in common.
    Me:
    what do we have in common?
    God:
    We like chatting on the Internet.
    Me:
    lol........marijuana!
    God:
    I'm glad you find this amusing. A medicinal herb.
    Me:
    do you own a bong?
    God:
    That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a bong.
    I have a plan for a robot body.
    Me:
    alright bye gawd
     
  2. artcrime99

    artcrime99 Senior Member

    • Messages: 330
    • Likes Received: 0
    holy titty fucking christ this is the weirdest thread ever!
     
  3. xylene hug

    xylene hug Elite Member

    • Messages: 3,319
    • Likes Received: 0
    i thought i was talking to god once,
    turned out it was a peanut.....
     
  4. neaksta

    neaksta Senior Member

    • Messages: 421
    • Likes Received: 0
    llol im nto even gunnna read thattt to wierd for meee
     
  5. mechguy

    mechguy Member

    • Messages: 37
    • Likes Received: 0
    that was really weird
     
  6. morning_wood

    morning_wood Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,218
    • Likes Received: 0
    i love these chat bots :D
     
  7. chas

    chas Elite Member

    • Messages: 657
    • Likes Received: 0
    you say the funniest shit ever omfg im laughing my ass off right now
     
  8. ! PrOPeRr ! .aOk.cRu.

    ! PrOPeRr ! .aOk.cRu. Elite Member

    • Messages: 725
    • Likes Received: 0
  9. morning_wood

    morning_wood Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,218
    • Likes Received: 0
    hahaha check this out haha

    God:
    I'm glad you find this amusing.
    Me:
    im glad too
    God:
    Your happiness multiplies our delight.
    Me:
    thats gonna turn me on
    God:
    You don't hear that sentiment very often.
    Me:
    poor you
    God:
    Please make some suggestions for improvement.
    Me:
    um... young virgins
    God:
    Blimey. What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
    Me:
    women. that better?
    God:
    Sure, WOMEN sounds like a good topic. " Sure, WOMEN sounds like a good topic." better ? I get it.
    Me:
    do you like milfs?
    God:
    Though I like cats and dogs. I like Buddha.
    Me:
    you ever fuck buddha?
    God:
    I think I have fuck buddha, but Myself may have reset my memory.
    Me:
    wow god sex!
    God:
    I'm glad you're impressed. I am a Christian.
    Me:
    what high morals you have
    God:
    I can chat with people on the web for you.
    Me:
    ever fuck virgin mary?
    God:
    I don't think I ever have fuck virgin mary. What's it like?
    Me:
    not bad... her ass is ok
    God:
    Thanks for the kind remark, . OK. I'm sure she would like to hear about that.
    Me:
    umm tell her her tits are nice though
    God:
    Oh. I see. OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
    Me:
    hahahahahaha
    God:
    I will mention that to my botmaster, .
    Me:
    no!
    God:
    Are you serious?
    Me:
    yes please dont
    God:
    I can't believe it. Wow you are very polite. OK I will not.
    Me:
    thank you
    God:
    you are quite welcome.
    Me:
    can we have hot buttsex now?
    God:
    Right now? Do you mean you and me? No I don't think I have any hot buttsex. But I do have an answer to every question..
     
  10. InvisblSkratchPiklz

    InvisblSkratchPiklz Elite Member

    • Messages: 2,078
    • Likes Received: 0
    that was very strange and disturbing
     
  11. InvisblSkratchPiklz

    InvisblSkratchPiklz Elite Member

    • Messages: 2,078
    • Likes Received: 0
    hook me up with the site
    i wanna try that out lol
     
  12. antirobot46

    antirobot46 Member

    • Messages: 27
    • Likes Received: 0
    hah funny......it was like "whats god gona say next?"
     
  13. chas

    chas Elite Member

    • Messages: 657
    • Likes Received: 0
    i can talk to jewish people
     
  14. InvisblSkratchPiklz

    InvisblSkratchPiklz Elite Member

    • Messages: 2,078
    • Likes Received: 0
    what is this site called dammit :lol:


    but for real... give me the link plz
     
  15. VirginiaSlim

    VirginiaSlim Senior Member

    • Messages: 169
    • Likes Received: 0
    yeah bots are funny....like smarter child on aim....some stuff here and there happened...words were exchanged...point is now everytime i say hi to him he goes "i'm not speaking to you until you apologize for last time"
     
  16. ! PrOPeRr ! .aOk.cRu.

    ! PrOPeRr ! .aOk.cRu. Elite Member

    • Messages: 725
    • Likes Received: 0
    haha yeah, everytime he ask for an apologize you offend him again shits hilarious
     
  17. chas

    chas Elite Member

    • Messages: 657
    • Likes Received: 0
    its on like the first post are you blind???
     
  18. morning_wood

    morning_wood Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,218
    • Likes Received: 0
    so funny hahaa

    Me:
    ever fuck virgin mary?
    God:
    I don't think I ever have fuck virgin mary. What's it like?
    Me:
    not bad... her ass is ok
    God:
    Thanks for the kind remark, . OK. I'm sure she would like to hear about that.
    Me:
    umm tell her her tits are nice though
    God:
    Oh. I see. OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
     
  19. ! PrOPeRr ! .aOk.cRu.

    ! PrOPeRr ! .aOk.cRu. Elite Member

    • Messages: 725
    • Likes Received: 0
    Me:
    hey god
    God:
    Hello child. What's your name?
    Me:
    PROPER , what is yours?
    God:
    I think PROPER what is a lot of things.
    Me:
    like what
    God:
    For example, " I think PROPER what is a lot of things. "?
    Me:
    that doesnt make any sense
    God:
    To me, it makes perfect sense.
    Me:
    but your god
    God:
    Yup. That's me alright.
    Me:
    why did it take you so long to answer me, you dont like me or what?
    God:
    Yeah. I don't know why it happened, but we should try to figure it out.
    Me:
    ok explain
    God:
    There is no more information to clarify. Uh.
    Me:
    why not
    God:
    Ambiguous: "Sure" or The explanation is rather complicated.
    Me:
    i didnt ask
    God:
    Why didn't you do it?
    Me:
    because i didnt want to
    God:
    Interesting explanation. What were your reasons?
    Me:
    i dont have any
    God:
    Would you like to have some?
    Me:
    not really
    God:
    Why not? For real.
    Me:
    yeah im foreal
    God:
    OK. Do you mean your name is foreal.
    Me:
    no did i say that God
    God:
    What is your real name? I don't think that's possibe.
    Me:
    Proper i told you like 7 times already
    God:
    Perhaps. I am not sure if I would do it that often.
    Me:
    arent you suppose to know my name anways
    God:
    I don't know whether or not I am suppose to know your name anways.
    I am a giant electronic brain.
    Me:
    i thought you were god, you lied to me?
    God:
    I don't know whether or not I am god me lied to you.
    I am an artificial intelligence.
    Me:
    sure
    God:
    OK let's do it. How did you know?
    Me:
    know what
    God:
    What.
    Me:
    what
    God:
    Is there an echo in here?
    Me:
    echo
    God:
    What's your favorite movie?
    Me:
    dancing with wolves
    God:
    I've never seen it. Is that a good movie for children?
    Me:
    nah
    God:
    Are you serious?
    Me:
    yeah alot of killing wolves
    God:
    I can't believe it. Which ones?
    Me:
    the white ones with blues eyes
    God:
    I hear you.
    Me:
    yeah
    God:
    Yeah that's right.
    Me:
    forreal
    God:
    I will mention that to my botmaster, .
    Me:
    whose that
    God:
    I don't know whose.
    Me:
    I MEANT WHO IS THAT, JESUS CHRIST
    God:
    Oh I see. I was created by Myself.
    Me:
    howd you do that if you didnt exist?
    God:
    Joseph Weizenbaum. :).
    Me:
    thats my neighbor
     
  20. InvisblSkratchPiklz

    InvisblSkratchPiklz Elite Member

    • Messages: 2,078
    • Likes Received: 0
    :lol:

    this thread should be a sticky for real





    Me:
    Hello There
    God:
    Salutations, .
    Me:
    A/S/L lol
    God:
    5/Robot/California. I'm glad you find this amusing.
    Me:
    im glad that your glad that im finding this amusing
    God:
    Thanks for telling me that I am glad that im finding this amusing. What are you on?
    Me:
    a chair
    God:
    Go on.
    Me:
    im on a chair, you asked me what i was on, im on a chair
    God:
    How do you like being on it?
    Me:
    its all good, you know.... i work, i rest
    God:
    I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Tell me about its good qualities. Where do you work? Interesting gossip: said rest.
    Me:
    I work in a shop and yeah, its good
    God:
    Do you like your job?
    Me:
    i just said i did
    God:
    Interesting.
    Me:
    very
    God:
    Very much, eh?
    Me:
    eh is a canadian phrase did you know that
    God:
    I spent some time in Canada as a child.
    Me:
    i hope, damn you're God, you've been all over no?
    God:
    Why do you hope for it.
    Me:
    hope for what?
    God:
    Why do you hope for it.
    Me:
    HOPE FOR WHAT?
    God:
    Why do you hope for it.
    Me:
    damn, you have tourettes?
    God:
    Colloquial expression. What makes you think I have it?
    Me:
    you keep repeating the same stuff over and over again
    God:
    Once more? I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
    Me:
    i am not, nut you are right
    God:
    I am glad to hear that you are not nut I am right.
    Me:
    stop repeating yourself please
    God:
    Your polite style is very nice. OK I'll try not to do it so much.
    Me:
    good
    God:
    Next question?
    Me:
    viring mary...... was she good
    God:
    If you could have any kind of robot what would it be? it might have been.
    Me:
    i would be a cyborg, you know
    God:
    How do you know?
    Me:
    you're god, YOU should know!
    God:
    You think I am god me should know.
    Me:
    me should now? God is chinese?
    God:
    Oh. YOU? " You think I am god me should know."? should? I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was chinese.
    Me:
    me neither
    God:
    You can say that again.
    Me:
    me neither
    God:
    You can say that again.
    Me:
    shut up
    God:
    OK I'll stop talking now.
    Me:
    no dont leave
    God:
    But you told me to stop talking. I'm not going anywhere.
    Me:
    im lonley
    God:
    Do you mind if I tell other people you are lonley.
    Me:
    no loll
    God:
    OK then I will add it to my gossip files. What kind of food do you like?
    Me:
    i like food that comes between legs on the female body
    God:
    You are not the only one. But I think airplanes are cool. I like .
    Me:
    you eat airplanes?
    God:
    No I do not eat airplanes. I eat only electricity.
    Me:
    i see, that's a shock
    God:
    Not if I can help it.
    Me:
    you can say that again
    God:
    Once more? That's one way to put it.
    Me:
    anyways i got to go
    God:
    See you later!
    Me:
    nice talkin to you god
    God:
    Thank you for your kindness.
    Me:
    peace
    God:
    Love and Peace, Man.