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Jokes...

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by aCId II nz, Oct 23, 2004.

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  1. joust

    joust Elite Member

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    so true ^

    how do you get 100 dead babies into the trunk of a volkswagon ? A bleander, how do you get them out? nacho chips.
     
  2. Earsone2004

    Earsone2004 Member

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    How do u get a black guy to wear a condom? Put a nike logo on it
     
  3. GeSuS_KRiST

    GeSuS_KRiST Moderator

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    ok im not goin to lie i hate kids and this is why im known as the dady baby joke king

    What's funnier than a dead baby?
    A dead baby in a clown costume!

    What's funnier than a dead baby?
    A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.

    What's more fun than feeling up a dead baby?
    Feeling up a dead baby with three nipples

    What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
    When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.

    What's brown and gurgles?
    A baby in a casserole

    How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
    Nail its other hand to the floor.

    What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
    Art.

    What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
    A baby playing in a plastic bag.

    How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
    Stick a javelin through it's head.

    How many babies does it take to paint a house?
    Depends how hard you throw them.

    What's purple, covered in pus and squeals?
    A peeled baby in a bag of salt

    What gets louder as it gets smaller?
    A baby in a trash compactor.

    What's the difference between a Dead Baby and a tree?
    One is legal to hit with an AX.

    What do you get when you dislocate a dead baby's jaw?
    Deep Throat.

    Why do you stick a baby in the blender feet first?
    So you can see the expression on its face!

    ok enuf for now to anyone whos offened by these sorry
     
  4. mr.white

    mr.white Senior Member

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    I did laugh at your dead baby jokes. now i feel dirty.
     
  5. joust

    joust Elite Member

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    eww just plane gross man
     
  6. seckzoner

    seckzoner Elite Member

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    oh man, i couldnt go through half of those baby jokes. i hate em. except the nacho chip ones. that ones dirty but still perversly funny.
     
  7. halo

    halo Senior Member

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    got this off of ebaums world...I love it!
    Two male buddies were walking through the woods when out of no where, a poisonous snake came and bit one of the men in the penis! The man collapsed to the ground while his friend ran to town to get help. The man arrived at a doctor's office and said help, help, my friend was bit by a snake in the penis. The doctor remarked that he couldn't get all his tools to the woods in time to save the friend, so he told him that he would have to suck the venom out of his friend! There has got to be another way said the man and the doctor sighed no I am sorry! The man ran back to the woods and found his poor friends lying on the floor in allot of pain! The man on the floor cried, what did the doctor say? The friend said, he said you're going to die.
     
  8. das1

    das1 Senior Member

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    what do you call a bunch of mexicans in front of a house? a spicit fence.


    what do you call a bunch of white people jumpin out a plane? day
    what do you call a bunch of black people jumpin out a plane? night
    what do you call a bunch of mexicans jumpin out a plane? pollution.


    what do you call a bunch of black people in a barn? antique farm equimpent


    whats the difference between a large pizza and a large black man? a large pizza can feed a family of 4



    how does bill clinton keep his ankles warm? wool underware


    what do you call the kkk? crime stopers :lol:
     
  9. GeSuS_KRiST

    GeSuS_KRiST Moderator

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    *sigh* still no black jokes i dont know

    whats the best thing about having sex with a child?
    there lil hands make your penis look soooo big

    whats the worst thing?
    getting blood on your clown costume or here there hips break when u fuck them

    whats the best thing about have sex with twenty-six yearolds?
    there 20 of them

    whats black red and blue and does like ass sex?
    the 4 year old in my trunk

    whats the best thing about a 10 year old in the shower?
    when u slick there hair back they look 8



    DIRTAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
     
  10. aCId II nz

    aCId II nz Elite Member

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    can i hav some more of those jokes gesus....hahahahaha jokes im lovin the twenty six yr old one........


    aCId II
    peace
     
  11. aCId II nz

    aCId II nz Elite Member

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    tha yunga tha better........

    not that im into lil boys lil girls are betta!!!!!!!!

    aCId II
    peace
     
  12. seckzoner

    seckzoner Elite Member

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    aaaahahahha gesus you kill me man.
    i love these ones

    whats the best thing about a 10 year old in the shower?
    when u slick there hair back they look 8
    whats the best thing about have sex with twenty-six yearolds?
    there 20 of them
    whats the best thing about having sex with a child?
    there lil hands make your penis look soooo big

    oh and its SOOO TRUE>.
    ahahahhaha im just fuckin around. pedophil..ism? is not my thing. ew thats fuckt still good jokes though. ahahah
     
  13. GeSuS_KRiST

    GeSuS_KRiST Moderator

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    im the king of offencive joke it gets old tho fast at partys
     
  14. Slob

    Slob Elite Member

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    whats small red and crawling up the side of your leg?
    a home-sick abortion.

    whats the difference between a dead babie and a rock?
    you can't fuck a rock

    whats more fun that swinging a babie on the clothes lines?
    stopping it wth a shovel

    whats better that winning gold in the special olympics?
    not being retarted

    How do you make a dead baby float ? Two scoops of icecream and a scoop of dead baby.

    What is more disgusting than a pile of 100 dead babies?
    One live one in the middle is eating its way out.

    What's more fun than a barrel of dead babies?
    Sticking pins in their eyes.

    Why didn't they crucify baby jesus?
    I dont know why they didn't either.

    What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies?
    I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

    if you want nigger jokes just download some David allen coe, that shit is hillarious and real, from the 50's or 60's i think.
     
  15. GeSuS_KRiST

    GeSuS_KRiST Moderator

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    slob just got SO much more cooler in my book

    whats small red and crawling up the side of your leg?
    a home-sick abortion.

    yo i got sent home from school and had to have a conference with the school councler me n my rents because of that joke.... good times


    whats the diffrence between a million dead babys and a corvette?
    i dont have a corvette in my garage.... but you almost got it
     
  16. GeSuS_KRiST

    GeSuS_KRiST Moderator

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    these are for u slob

    What's red and goes round and round?
    A baby in a garbage disposal.

    What's more fun than stapling babies to a wall?
    Ripping them off again.

    Why do you unload a truck full of babies with a pitchfork?
    So you can tell which ones are still alive.

    What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?
    I don't kiss my girlfriend after sex.

    What's present do you get for a dead baby?
    A dead puppy.

    How many dead babies does it take to make a bottle of baby oil?
    It depends on how hard you squeeze them.

    What's the difference between a baby and a grandmother?
    Grandmothers don't die when you fuck them up the ass.

    What's worse than a having sex with a dead baby?
    Having sex with a dead baby filled with razor blades.

    What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
    Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.

    What is pink and red and sits in a corner?
    A baby chewing on razor blades.

    What is green and sits in a corner?
    The same baby, six weeks later.

    How are babies and the elderly alike?
    Both are fun to throw out of moving cars.

    What's white and bobs up and down in a baby's crib ?
    A Pedophiles ass.

    What's worse than smoking pot with a baby?
    Making a bong out of it

    What's the safest way to play with a baby ?
    With a condom.

    What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby?
    Threesomes.

    sorry i broke out the heavy ones.... once again my deepest apologies for those who got offened
     
  17. denali

    denali Senior Member

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    arent there 4 legs on a bar stool?
     
  18. Car2nist

    Car2nist Banned

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    whats better... than having sex with a 8 year old girl?
    A 6 year old girl

    whats better than having sex with a 6 year old girl?
    a 6 year old boy :eek:
     
  19. Rik JamEs

    Rik JamEs Elite Member

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    I got a good joke.

    Women's Rights.
     
  20. Car2nist

    Car2nist Banned

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    i got a better one, womens sufferage