i can only see the second image but its not legible. Work from the letters you wrote below the tag and keep it simple. Im gonna copy my post from the blackbooks thread:

"Flow" is an obscure word, but it kinda refers to the way letters fit together and create movement, momentum, and sort of one object out of several letters, and it's important in every part of graffiti.
start simple, then try giving the letters the same angle or warping them all the same way. the reason some tags are so illegible is because the letters are so exaggerated, rather than just adding random extensions. You kind of just have to write your tag over and over again in regular letters and eventually you'll see places where a line can be extended or added, but you can't force style which is something im still learning.