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Suicide

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Msfyt, May 7, 2007.

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  1. anti-anti-crime

    anti-anti-crime Elite Member

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    Holy shit why is their so much hate going on in this thread? Have you guys ever heard 'to every man his own?' For fucks sake, we're all on the same forum, and we're all in the same thread for a reason. If your not in this thread cause you need help or want to help, get the fuck out. I'm serious, Thrice, along with anybody else in this thread who's here for the right reason, does NOT need you fucking bullshit on top of there own problems. So if your not going to help in any way, constructive or other wise, you just need to go troll somewhere else.

    On the lighter side.

    Thrice: I've struggled with my own sexuality through my teenage hood, and I can't easily say it was because of the times I was sexually abused. I don't know why, I thought I was bi for sometime. But I know that I'm not now. Whatever reason your friend has, it isn't easy to say it was just a single event that caused him to want dick. If he knows now that he's straight or completely gay, or still bi, their isn't one single contributing factor to make him the way he is. One can argue it is because he's human that he's straight, just as well as one could argue he's gay because he has a chemical imbalance.

    Okay. As for myself. I'm not struggling right now, but life isn't too great, either. I don't have a car, so I haven't seen my girl in forever. I'm finishing up high school, which is good. But that also means I need to find a place to stay, a car, and a job. Along with struggling with my own mental problems for some time, I've been trying to sort out other shit in my life that needs to get sorted out. With all this, it's fair to say I'm stressed. I've dealt with much, much more, but since when is stress something easy to deal with? Stress = depression in my head. The more stress, the far more depressed I get. Fuckin' chemicals ain't changing that, and neither is therapy.
     
  2. Thrice

    Thrice Elite Member

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    I mean religious beliefs would be applicable in a suicide thread, tends to involve spirituality for many people who are diagnosed.

    Anti: My recommendation for you is to try to get in school part time or full time, whatever works. Even community college is better than no education at all, don't want to sit around and do jack shit with ur life, trust me things will only get worse. Im sure you can apply for some financial aid as well as get on some student loans. That way you have more time to worry about getting a car/job, but by the time you graduate im sure you'll have somethingn going for you. I myself am going to have to pay 25k in student loans when I get out of school, but Im able to make some dough along the way to support myself and 2 years in am already having some heavy jobs setup that will have a legit pay out. Financial stress is common and a big pain in the ass, especially at times like these. I'd just go for loans and give yourself some breathing room. Too young to have to worry about living place, car, and job considering you haven't even entered college yet.
     
  3. KAZonee

    KAZonee Senior Member

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    wen i was about 12 my brother died in a fire in my house wen i herd that he died i cudnt really believe it hit me hard the thing that hurt me the most was that i never sed iloveyou or anything like that too him the only reason i started writin was becuz of his death so icud cope with it idk like sometimes i jus feel like i can end my life just make all over soo quick wid a simple knife just to get away from all these peopl bitchen at you gettin stressed out over stupid shit but then you think how sad your mother wud be if her baby died or worse killed himself but im only 15 its wayy to young to be ending your life wen you got so much to live for i feel like a lil gurl just comin on a forum and sayin this but i miss my brother
     
  4. Hopeoner

    Hopeoner Member

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    double post i know.

    KAZ thats sad man. i feel for you. nobody should go through that but your brother would want you to live life until something stops you. i cant imagine what its like to lose a brother so young. for it to happen not to long ago i can see why you would feel that way. just try and stay in there bro.
     
  5. menso

    menso Senior Member

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    i thought about killin myself many times.. graff keeps me sane.... when i woke up and found my mom screamin on the ground and she died by my side it fucked me up...then my dad left the picture told me he wanted nothing to do with me after she died... stressin bout this everyday... music helps too
     
    Last edited: May 9, 2010
  6. Punx

    Punx Member

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    True, some people like Ted Bundy act upon there tendencies more than just any other human being and actually go more in depth with whatever is inside their heads which tells them to commit serial killings.
     
  7. ChemDawggyJohnson

    ChemDawggyJohnson Senior Member

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    as bad as this sounds, I wouldve done it if I never started writing, I grew up in a little suburban town with a bunch of bitchass kids, never had a real circle of friends. after losing the few true friends I had and my pops to drug overdoses, I had some damn dark days. I never liked hard drugs, so I guess graf was my outlet, or activity to help ease the pain and forget about the shitty hand that life dealt me. Now, Im pretty stable and try to be there for people I see that remind me of myself.
     
  8. FuckTheFame

    FuckTheFame Elite Member

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    feel like dying today
     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2010
  9. PulseWithLife

    PulseWithLife Elite Member

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    Funny its only been lately that the thought of killing myself has come into my head. I have started to have no energy or happyness about any thing. Lifes getting harder to deal with by the day. I feel like the whole world is out to get me. What happends when mates turn out to not be mates ? What happends when even family aint there for ya any more ? The meaning of life just ponders threwout my mind till answers are seen
     
  10. PulseWithLife

    PulseWithLife Elite Member

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    On the other hand ive learned that if lifes fucked ya gotta change it for yourself. No Unity just you and me reefer, the pain, contaminate your vains thinkin things gonna change
     
  11. Loki X Sho

    Loki X Sho Banned

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    When you find that you're a lone wolf, you find a new wolf pack. There will always be accepting people in the world..I'm here alone at school hours away from every one that I love allll for the first time, and its real lonely..but you learn to care about people every where that you go. Things will work out if you want them to and if you put in an effort!
    And if theres one thing I learned, by all means ponder the meaning of life, but don't take your conclusions to heart because nobody knows the real answers. Let your mind rest and just hang on.
     
  12. butt3rs

    butt3rs New Member

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    im new to this website and the graffiti community altogether, this is my first post. 4 years ago when i was in the 6th grade (i was 12) i felt that i was unwanted, people didnt want to be around me, i would eat lunch by myself every day, i wouldnt talk to anyone. Around the middle of the year i started talking to 2 girls and eventually i became friends with them. One day i opened up to one of the girls who told the other one how i had felt, that i was contemplating suicide. They told my guidance counselor who i would see every day for months after school about the issue. When she told my parents, i had to see a psychiatrist. During all these sessions, nothing seemed to heelp and i felt like that i wanted to die. I thought what would people say if i was dead. I knew my parents would cry but i wondered about the kids in school, would they joke about it. I eventually became good friends with the girl who told my guidance counselor how i had felt. During the 7th grade everything seemed fine in my life. When I was in the 8th grade, the same girl who told me i was like a brother to her, stopped talking to me after she became friends with a kid who would punch me, put food in my hair, and get everyone to pick on me. The 8th grade was a year of hell that i kept my feelings masked and didnt tell anyone how i felt. My first year of high school (finished freshman year this previous june) me and my family went to a family counselor for my brother who was unmotivated to do anything. On the car ride back i opened up to my mom how i felt about kids in school and how on a daily basis i contemplated suicide. You could say that my life is repetition. I still had mixed emotions, the greatest compliment i ever got from a girl was that im a great guy, she was drunk when she said that. Even though i have those mixed feelings, i know i would never commit suicide just because i dont have the guts to do it, maybe theres a tiny part of me inside that knows things will get better one of these days. People pick on me cus of being straight edge, but i shrug at it. Theres always something to live for, someone once told me that, and i believe it. You cant expect your life to go from bad to good in a heart beat, you can have to take the steps and change your life. I could go on and on about this but one last thing ill say before summing this up, music really helped me get through hard time. Anyway, if you bothered to read this long ass thing or merely skim it, either way i appreciate it.
     
  13. ChemDawggyJohnson

    ChemDawggyJohnson Senior Member

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    yo butters, dont sweat these clowns who fuck with you, but don't let them do it either... if you allow that to go on , you'll be there permenant bitch for all of your teenage years. there is always something to live for and you need to set a good example for your brother. young girls are usually attracted to douche bags that fiend for attention, thats just how it is, be patient and you'll find a chick that can think for herself and see the good in you. in the meantime, hit ur book and stand up for yourself. things'll play out in the long haul
     
  14. 2mor

    2mor Senior Member

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    yo butters man, if that shits still goin on...dont take it, i know its scary but psyche yourself up and next time the guy give you shit bust him in the nose, all of them guys are fuckin pussies trust me....the worst that could happen is ya get the shit kicked out of ya, but that does happen from time to time to everyone, and believe me people will think alot more of ya for standin up for yaself...im not sayin violence is always the answer but guy sounds like some people i knew at skool and when the guy the picked on bust one of their noses, no shit ever again, and everyone startin talkin to him and be like hey i heard you slapped frank or whoever yeah that guys a dick......rocky balboa style butters, the most important punch of your social life
     
  15. ..romero..

    ..romero.. Elite Member

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    my family is a wreck.my friends have all but ditched me.i havent talked to anyone in months.im completely stressed and depressed.it feels like no one gives a fuck about me.i dont know whether to be sad or angry...im tired.i dont care anymore.the only thing stopping me is the thought that one day it will all be better...and flawless victory's new sig.
     
  16. Loki X Sho

    Loki X Sho Banned

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    Now that you've recognized whats making you upset, remove yourself from that. I know its easier said than it is done, but the least you can do is try some new things, meet some new people. A lot of people are afraid to leave their comfort zone, but when you have no comfort zone left, then it leaves a lot of opportunity for improvement. Its hard to pull a complete life 180, but it can be done. A lot of the time you find yourself saying "nobody cares, they don't even call anymore.." you don't realize you have the ability to change that. Just start talking to some old friends again, go out one night and have a good time. I know the phone works both ways, sometimes you just gotta initiate things. You can get yourself back in the swing of things! And when all else fails, looks at FV's sig.
     
  17. unreal180

    unreal180 Elite Member

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    Dammn.

    Anyway,
    whenever i feel depressed i just wack on the jerremy kyle show
    at3_gstatic_com_images_730bae13ec4fe2de00ef1313ac26fcda._.jpg
    aimage.guardian.co.uk_sys_images_Arts_Arts__Pictures_2007_10_05_viviennevyle460.jpg
    ego boost!
     
  18. ..romero..

    ..romero.. Elite Member

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    i need to find better friends.everyone is cool with me when im doin good and got money or paint or drugs or whatever.but when im broke and goin through shit they all want to disappear.ive tried calling them.but they are always to busy to do anything.so i give up.i mean if i ever want to do something or hang out they find excuses and shit.but when i got things poppin they are the first ones knocking on my door and window tryna get the hook up.i used to talk to alot of people in school.but because i lived so far away from them i never socialized outside of school.so now that i dropped out i dont have those ties.my only real friend was haser and he left.i had alot of other cats i used to fuck with since like 5th grade but they turned bitch and snitched on me.the only other person outside of haser that ever truly cared about me left and moved a good 60 miles away.the people over here are just so trife though.its hard to make good friends.everyones always scheming and shit.then i got to go home and have my mother tell me im worthless and that im a piece of shit and a faggot or a motherfucker or that she wishes i was never born and shit.i hear that every day and it wears on you.its not like before when she would beat you and you know fight you and shit.because i can fight back.but once she says that shit the damage is done.i feel like im turning into her.a lonely angry person with a grudge against the world.i dont want to be like that.i think thats why i got problems with self esteem and have to constantly prove myself to people.i know i do it on here i probably do it irl.i dont wanna kill myself because i just feel like its probably not all bad i mean there are others out there with more shit goin on who pull through.most of my feelings are just from having depression and hsit.the lonelyness and stress just adds to the effect of the depression.my problems arent that bad i dont think its just i cant shake this depressive feeling.and the fact that i have no one to talk to and get my mind off it makes it build up...its hard having no support system,no family that gives a fuck about you and no real friends to be there for you either.i just feel like i gotta face everything on my own.i practically raised myself.and its like boxing with mike tyson and gettin stole on and having no one in your corner.thats what it feels like for me.
     
    Last edited: Sep 5, 2010
  19. FuckTheFame

    FuckTheFame Elite Member

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    it could be worse
    you could be schizophrenic man
    life is a lot worse when your depressed have no friends...and hear voices
    im actually afraid to go outside
    graffiti can be a huge therapy...until i would get jittery
    i hear voices in my head saying "just write on it" and shit like that
    shitty homelife really sucks tho man
    i wish i had a answer for you
    finding religion is a good way to go about it sometimes
    its like "god" can be your imaginary friend or something
    and that "god" can be whatever higher power you want it to be
    hell it can even be YOU
    then sooner or later after a while of brainwashing yourself into thinking that way you can become god
    as long as you think that your god cares
    im more of a man of science
    i believe there could be a god...but noone ever gave the thought that maybe it doesnt care
    but then again im kind of insane so it helps take away from hope if your like that
    sometimes you just gotta tell yourself...im super funkin cool
    haha just look in the mirror and say or something
    its a lot easier to go through life being a goofball and just silently bearing your cross
    because we all got a cross to bear these days
    its always good to try and find inner peace
    as wack as it sounds what harm is it to try it
    its kind of like your holier then thou among people...but your not trying to one up them
    its like your trying to show them the way if they are problem starters
    its like if you set up your own morals you'll have your own self cool...your zen if you will
    my problem is i got so fucking "pure" i forgot how to give myself credit for it
    try being the nice guy who hates the world
    those shoes suck man and they're mine
    plus i have people reading my thoughts everywhere i go
    just remember man your life could always be worse
    take control i guess and make it for the better
    and if not crawl in the bottle and just dont come out
    because ill be real with ya...life is a bitch
     
  20. PulseWithLife

    PulseWithLife Elite Member

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    This show will make ya people feel better youtube it